Do I Love Her? 48 Signs You’re Slowly but Surely Falling in Love with a Girl

Never been in true love before? You might be asking yourself, “do I love her?” Don’t worry, here are the signs you are in love with a girl.

Ah, love is a mysterious thing, romantically speaking. It is also a frustrating, angering, exciting, confusing, mind-blowing, and sometimes scary thing.

There is puppy love, infatuation, lust, and real love. Sometimes, it all feels the same, so much so that you might even be asking yourself, “do I love her?”

There is no clear test or quiz to figure out the difference between love and all those other similar feelings. It isn’t easy to figure out if she is the one for you or the one for this week with so many gray areas.

Love isn’t just about wanting to rip a girl’s clothes off, although that can definitely be a part of it. It is about this indescribable feeling.

Sure, love can be seen, heard, and experienced, but even people who have a vast knowledge of love have a hard time really explaining it. [Read: What does true love feel like?]

Lots of people say that when you know, you know. When love strikes you, it is an indescribable feeling, and you just know. But that is not always the case. Sometimes you need a message with all the signs you’re falling in love with her written across the sky.

Sometimes it takes a grand gesture or even losing someone to know for sure. Other times all it takes is a bit of self-discovery.

What is love?

Before you find the answer to the question, “do I love her?” you should know what love is. Love is not just one thing or one feeling. [Read: How to recognize love]

Love is a combination of so many emotions. It is a state of being. If you mix admiration, respect, lust, intimacy, passion, commitment, and trust, you get something that resembles love.

Figuring out if you’re in love with her can be as simple as just knowing. Trust your gut, and you might know. But, for those who’ve never been in love, are hesitant to be in love, or for whatever reason want to be really sure, read on for the signs that you’re truly in love with her.

How long does it take to feel love for someone? 

This is an age-old question that people have been trying to answer for centuries. And the problem is that it’s not easy to get one because every individual – and every couple – is different. [Read: Psychology of attraction – 6 types and the ones that make you fall in love]

However, there are some common findings in studies, and many of them say that men fall in love anywhere between 88 and 97 days of knowing a person. However, just because they feel in love doesn’t mean they verbalize it. 

For women, they take longer – 140-150 days. That is probably contrary to what most people would have guessed. Who would have thought that men fall in love faster than women? 

And believe it or not, some scientists say that love at first sight is actually a thing. However, it is based more on biological instincts to mate rather than actual love. But all the chemical reactions in the brain make it feel like love. [Read: Am I in love? 30 signs to read the fuzzy flutters after infatuation]

How quickly someone falls in love depends on a variety of factors. For example, someone’s emotional attachment style matters. Someone with an anxious attachment style might fall in love a lot faster than someone with an avoidant attachment style.

Whether or not a couple has had sex can also influence the rate at which a person falls in love. Falling in love can depend on having sex or lack thereof. Having sex with someone bonds people emotionally, and thus, will fall in love before a couple that hasn’t had sex.

Another weird factor that will determine how fast someone falls in love is if the person reminds them of one of their parents. It might sound a little creepy, but there’s a reason.

If the person’s behavior reminds you of one of your parents, then you’re more likely to feel close to them. It just makes you feel more familiar. [Read: Oneitis – what it is and 18 signs and stages of falling madly in love with one]

Are you avoiding or denying the signs you’re in love with her?

Sometimes we are even in denial about our feelings. You may very well be in love with someone, but for some reason or another, you don’t want to admit it.

Maybe you’re afraid of rejection or are not ready to be vulnerable. Or you are scared she isn’t ready to hear those words, or she’ll get spooked.

There are tons of reasons why fear prevents us from figuring out how we truly feel. But, if you truly want to know, learn the signs you’re in love with her. Once you do, you can finally do something about it.

What do you get when you fall in love? 

Love is a scary thing for a lot of people, but it is a beautiful thing when it is real and lasting. Here are some of the amazing things you get when you fall in love.

1. Happiness

Not that you can’t be happy when you’re not in love – of course, you can. In fact, to truly fall in love, you should be happy within. But when you’re in love, you have an extra source of happiness, and you just feel like you’re glowing or walking on Cloud 9.

2. Security

When we truly love our partner, and they truly love us back, then it makes both people feel secure. Real love makes us feel safe.

There is no jealousy or possessiveness because there is no room for those negative emotions when there is true love. It’s your safe haven. [Read: Commitment in a relationship – 27 ways to show it and feel secure in love]

3. Companionship

Being in love is like always being with your best friend. You never have to worry if you have a date for a wedding or who you’re going to hang out with on a Saturday night. Your partner is your companion, and there is no one else in the world you’d rather be with than that person.

4. Affection

Studies have shown that people need about 8 hugs a day. But if you’re single, you probably don’t get that much affection. But when you’re in love, you’re always hand-holding, hugging, cuddling, and just being physically close to one another.

5. Sex

Of course, this is a benefit almost everyone enjoys! When you’re in love, not only are having sex, it’s the best you’ve ever had.

Having sex with someone you love is a fulfilling and deeply emotional experience. It goes way beyond just the physical sensation of sexual activity. [Read: How important is sex in a relationship? The truth revealed]

Do I love her? The honest signs to know for sure

When a man is in love, he behaves differently than when he isn’t. He is less selfish, more protective, and a lot more understanding. Love isn’t just a feeling like saying, “I love that new taco place.” It changes you, your behavior, and even your future – if done right.

Love can be hard to figure out sometimes. Maybe you’re scared to admit that you love the girl or just aren’t sure and want to find out if you really love her or the idea of her. Maybe you’ve never been in love before and aren’t sure how it feels. Whatever your reason, look for these signs you’re in love with her, and then you’ll know for sure.

So, find out the answer if you find yourself asking yourself if you love the person you have in mind using these signs. [Read: Have you been hit by cupid’s arrow already?]

1. You want to share good news with her

Being in love means that she is who you go to when you want to celebrate. You want to share good moments with her. You want her to be proud of you.

If you burst at the seams to tell your girl all the good things that come your way before anyone else, that is a good sign you love her.

2. You want to share bad news with her

Even more critical, she becomes your emergency call. You know you love her when she is the first person you want to talk to when something bad happens, even if you haven’t fully processed what happened yet. You know her presence will improve any situation.

That is a sign of trust and support, which are huge parts of love. The first person you think of when the shit hits the fan is the person you trust and love. [Read: How to build trust in a relationship and learn to be loyal and loving]

3. You’re protective of her

You get angry or upset when someone treats her with disrespect. Whether it is her boss or a random dude at a restaurant, your first instinct is to make him pay. But, hopefully, you brush that aside and instead worry about how it is affecting her.

If you love her, instead of acting out in rage or jealousy, you are protective of her. You want her to feel comfortable and safe regardless of the anger you may have for the person that caused her pain.

4. You see her in your future

You know it’s love when you think about where you might be in a few months. Will she move in with you? Should you buy tickets for a show next year? [Read: 80 questions to ask before getting serious with her]

Can you picture having kids together or what it might be like to have her be a part of your family? You don’t think about the potential of a future together unless the feelings are real.

You may not be actively making plans with her, but you consider her even subconsciously when thinking about the future. If your boss offers you a promotion, you think about how it might help you two afford a nice place together.

You aren’t just thinking of yourself but incorporating her into things you never really thought about before. [Read: Key moments in a relationship that predict your future together]

Even if you’ve always wanted a sick bachelor pad, you’re more than happy to give that up to be happy with her. Changing something you thought was set in stone for her is a sign you love her.

5. You think about having kids

If you want kids *There’s nothing wrong with not wanting them, though* and you even think about possibly having kids with her, it might be a sign that she’s stolen your heart. [Read: Everything a couple must do before having a baby]

6. You think about what your kids would be like

If you’re not only thinking about having kids with her but imagining what they would be like, then you are one loved-up puppy. If you see qualities in her and think, “man, our kids are going to be awesome if they inherit that,” there’s a good chance that Cupid’s arrow has hit you. We find things in the people we love that we want to carry on and be a part of for eternity.

Even if you have never thought about having kids, these thoughts may just jump into your head because of human nature.

7. You really care about what she thinks of you

We all care about what people think of us at times. But, if the smallest criticism from her sends you reeling and rethinking who you are and makes you want to change, then there is a good possibility you love her. 

If she thinks you’re messy, you want to be more organized and tidier because she sees that potential in you. You want her to believe in you because her belief in you makes you want to be better.

8. You feel horrible when she is upset with you

If she is upset with you for anything, it breaks you. Whether you accidentally snapped at her, offended her, or made a mistake, knowing your actions hurt her is brutal. You would do anything to calm the situation and make sure she is no longer hurting.

If you truly love her, you’ll have no problem admitting you were wrong and saying sorry because you know she deserves it. [Read: Sweet ways to genuinely say “I’m sorry“]

9. You think about ways to make her happy

If you find yourself daydreaming about how to bring out her smile, then that might signal that you care more about her than you do yourself. When you’re out and about, you think about what little treats you can pick up to surprise her.

Small things like that say more about love than even grand gestures.

10. You find yourself daydreaming about her

You think about her when she isn’t there. A lot of people compartmentalize their lives. They have a workgroup, their family, their friends, and their partner.

But, when you are at work or with family and find yourself thinking about her or wondering what she’s doing, it could be love. [Read: Signs you’re emotionally attached and falling hard for someone]

If you can’t get anything done without seeing her face in your mind, then you are probably smitten. It may be even more than that. If you are more focused on making the evening special for her than getting your work done, love may be taking over.

Love is a strong enough feeling to distract you from big work meetings, sleeping, and even eating. If you think about her when she isn’t there, you are probably in love.

11. When she hurts, you hurt

If a coworker makes her cry or hurts her feelings, you feel that too. You aren’t just sad that she is upset but almost feel like an empath with her. When she is suffering, you are suffering no matter what caused it. Sharing that bond is a sign you love her. [Read: 30 ways to make someone feel better]

12. You care about what her family thinks

If you shower and clean yourself up just to meet some distant cousin, then you have been bitten by the love bug. This isn’t just about putting your best foot forward in terms of appearance, either.

You want to make a good impression and need them to know how much you care about her.

13. You want her to get to know your family

If you are close with your family, you only want to introduce them to someone you think is really special. And when you get the urge to introduce her to them, there is a reason for it. [Read: How to tell if there is serious chemistry between two people]

The fact that you aren’t running for the hills or not wanting to get involved is a huge sign that she stole your heart. Not only do you want to meet your partner’s friends or family, but you want her to meet yours. You want your worlds to mesh together. Being in love will do that to you.

Even if you can’t put it into words, there is a reason you want her to get to know your family and vice versa. And that reason is love.

14. You make decisions together

Where you live, your career moves, and your house buying are based on your life together. You don’t just make choices for yourself anymore.

You decide things together, even your weekend plans. When you want someone to be involved in all aspects of your life, it is probably because you love her. [Read: How to have a good relationship that keeps getting better]

15. You’ve made a commitment

If you are okay with tying yourself to her by adopting an animal together, that is the kind of commitment you don’t just make willy-nilly. You are in it for the long haul. An animal of any kind means you don’t see an end in sight.

16. You like her “flaws”

The things she sees as flaws, you just see them. You don’t nitpick at her worst habits. Instead, you think the way she taps her foot when she is nervous is cute. You don’t have feelings for her in spite of these things, but because of them just as much as all the good stuff.

Love makes you see imperfect things perfectly. It’s not that you’re ignoring or looking past anything, but that you truly love her for everything she is. [Read: The 3-month milestone – Time to get real and let the crazy out]

17. When she needs you, there isn’t anything you wouldn’t do to be there for her

You would move mountains, take out the biggest guy ever, or tell your mom to back off if she needs you to. When she is crying to you on the phone, you’re willing to drop everything to be with her.

You won’t find her needing you to be a burden but a privilege. That is a key sign you love her.

18. You want to know how she feels about you

If you find you feel vulnerable and often worry that you care more about her than she does, that is called fear of rejection. This isn’t just about your ego but due to your feelings for her. You crave to hear how she feels about you. [Read: How to know if a girl likes you]

You care so deeply that you can’t imagine that she cares for you this much. Having those intense emotions mimics love pretty darn closely.

19. You still have butterflies with her

If you’re still having that feeling of lust and butterflies long after the honeymoon phase is over, that’s when you know that the answer to your burning question, “do I love her?” is yes. Love may switch from one kind to another, but if you are truly “in love,” you go back and forth. You still find yourself thinking she is amazing and beautiful.

You may not be nervous around her, but you still get giddy about going on a date with her, and it is super sweet. [Read: 25 reasons to love someone and hold onto them forever]

20. She has the ability to make everything okay

If she takes dark and stormy skies and makes them bright and blue, then that is the person that you should hold onto. *Sorry about the rhyming, but it works*

If just sitting next to her when you’re in a bad mood makes things a little brighter, it may be because you love her. She might not actually be doing anything, but just being with her makes things better than they were without her. That is love.

21. You enjoy just watching her sleep in the morning

People aren’t always pretty when they sleep. Some people snore or drool or say weird things in their sleep. And although this may either sound like something straight out of a rom-com or a little creepy, you find watching her sleep to be soothing.

If no matter what she does when she sleeps, you still see her as spectacular, then, my friend, that is love! [Read: 50 questions for a new relationship to predict your romantic future]

22. You catch yourself watching her when you are out and think about how lucky you are

If you find yourself in the midst of a party looking around for her just to get a glimpse of her beautiful face, then you are probably in love. It just is what it is. You see her laughing with friends or playing with someone’s dog, and you smile, thinking about how good you have it. That is love.

23. You would rather fight with her than be content with someone else

Even when you’re in the middle of a fight, you want to take her in your arms.

Whether you’re being given the silent treatment by the woman you love, or she sold your favorite ugly cargo shorts, you still wouldn’t have it any other way. Love allows you to gloss over the not-so-lovely. [Read: Why fighting is important in a relationship & how to do it right]

24. You can’t even think about losing her

If you are almost scared of looking into the future and her not being there, then that is a sign you are in love with her. You want to be with her all the time and never want her out of your life. So, if you can’t even fathom what it would feel to lose her, then you are in love.

25. WWSD

Instead of thinking, “what would Jesus do” you think, “what would she do?” You respect and value her opinion so much when you’re in a tough spot, you consider how she would handle it and may even reach out for advice.

26. You want to tell her that you love her

If you have the urge to say those three little words to her, you love her. That is your gut yelling, “WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?” [Read: Should you say “I love you” first? Or wait to hear it?]

27. You’ve never felt like this

Whether you’ve been in love before or not, every love is different. If the feelings you have for her can’t be compared to anything you’ve felt before, it is probably love. You love her. If you want to say it, you should.

28. You’re not afraid of commitment

Most guys have some level of fear when it comes to commitment. Whether you picked that up from society, the media, or just your own family, it is a real fear. But, with her, that fades away.

Think about Chandler from Friends. He was afraid of any level of commitment until Monica, and then he was more than happy to move in together and get married because he loved her. [Read: 19 signs you’re ready for a serious relationship]

29. You trust her

Trust and love go hand in hand. Although one can break, it usually pulls the other with it. If you trust her with your secrets and are comfortable being yourself with her, the odds are you love her. Stop questioning it and enjoy it.

30. You’re vulnerable with her

If you are a guy who rarely opens up about his feelings, but you feel yourself opening up like a book around her, there is a reason for that, and it isn’t that she is some sort of psychic.

She makes you feel safe and secure. You aren’t afraid she’ll judge you. You want her to know all of you because you love her. [Read: How to be vulnerable in a relationship without feeling too scared]

31. Your friends notice how happy you are

Your friends point out that you’re glowing or just seem different and happier since you’ve been with her. Whether she is around or you’re texting her, the people in your life know you’re in love. If they see these changes in you, they are spot on. You love her.

32. You talk about her a lot

When you’re really in love with her, she’s always what’s on your mind. You can’t help yourself. You find excuses to bring her up in random conversations. Everything someone says makes you think of her or something she told you.

This has always been a clear sign of love for a lot of people. When they know they’re in love, it is because they feel the need to bring up this person in every conversation.

If someone is talking about a vacation they took, they must share how this person took a vacation last summer. [Read: 15 traits that set selfless love apart from selfish love]

If someone talks about a new restaurant, you mention that this girl went to a new restaurant and said it was great. Whether or not what you have to say really contributes or adds to the conversation, you just need to say it.

33. You’re scared and excited

When you date someone you don’t love, you feel pretty fine about it. You aren’t worried about getting your heart broken, or your ring rejected because you aren’t that invested.

But, when you are in love with her, you are terrified of losing her. Admitting how you feel terrifies you because she may not feel the same way back. You fear being hurt because you are in love, and that hurts the most. [Read: How to beat the debilitating, awful fear of rejection]

Love is a scary thing. It is a risk. But it is so exciting and liberating. There is nothing like it. The reason love is so exciting is because of that fear.

If you feel scared and excited about her and your relationship all at once, that is love, my friend. [Read: How to overcome the fear of losing someone you love]

34. You feel euphoria 

Love gives you a feeling that is equivalent to a high. You can feel like you’re on drugs when you’re in love. If you notice yourself feeling sort of light and airy, but you can’t quite place your finger on why, you may very well be in love with her.

A sign of love is feeling an indescribable sensation. You may not notice it at first, but think about it, and it may come to light. [Read: What is dopamine? The dopest pleasure pill lives inside you]

35. You’re more empathetic

Being in love lets you see things from her point of view. You want to understand her, what she cares about, and how she is the way she is.

A sign you’re in love with her is openness to her way of thinking. Whether it’s by trying a new show she recommended, tasting a weird food she likes, or even considering her stance on something like politics or religion, there is a good chance love is in the air.

36. Other people notice your glow

One of the first signs you’re in love with her is when your friends and family notice something about you. A person in love gives off a positive vibe. She brings a smile to your face, you’re in a better mood, and you’re a little more distracted than usual. [Read: The truest signs of true love in any relationship]

But if your friends and family always wonder why you’re so happy or smiling all the time, you may be in love. Yay!

37. You care how she feels

When you like a girl, you worry about how her feelings will affect you. You wonder if she will get mad at you or nag you. But, when you’re in love with her, you truly care about her a lot.

You genuinely care if she is upset, and you want to make her happy. You aren’t just worried about cheering her up, but you want to let her talk about it and want to be with her no matter her mood to make sure her needs are met without her even asking. [Read: 19 sure signs of falling in love to watch out for]

38. You’re less selfish

When dating someone you just sort of like, you might cancel plans or feel sort of blah about seeing them, but when you’re in love with her, you are excited. You don’t just show up early, but you bring flowers.

You go out of your way for her. Even if things are less convenient for you, you do them for her.

39. Everything reminds you of her

One of the signs you’re in love with her is seeing her everywhere. You think you saw her at the hardware store. You see a dog that sort of looks like hers and think of her. [Read: Infatuation vs. love – 20 ways you can tell the difference]

Whether a commercial, song on the radio, or something a friend said, everything reminds you of her. Why would you constantly think about her unless it was love?

40. You’re starting to relate to those sappy radio songs

Before you fell in love, you might have made fun of all those romantic songs on the radio. You might have preferred to listen to hard rock or rap. But now you don’t mind the sappy songs because they remind you of her. And that’s all you want to think about anyway.

41. You’re full of date and gift ideas

A lot of guys find planning dates to be a chore. They don’t really like getting creative or thinking of new things to do because it’s an effort. But not for you.

You actually enjoy it because you know it will make her happy. And you can’t wait to buy her little gifts to see her eyes light up too. [Read: Romantic dinner date ideas – The best fun dates you will both never forget]

42. You feel unusually optimistic

Not that you’re usually a pessimistic person, but you feel like the biggest optimist in the world because she makes you feel that way. Even if are a pessimist, you feel like a new man and see the world in a whole new, positive light.

43. You think she’s the prettiest girl in the room

She might not be a supermodel, but in your eyes, she is. It doesn’t even matter where you are or who you’re with, you think no woman can hold a candle to her. There is no one else you can imagine wanting to date but her because she is so beautiful in your eyes.

How to tell her you’re in love with her

Now that you know whether or not you’re in love with her, it is time to do something about it. You do not just want to sit on those feelings. [Read: How to tell a girl you love her without losing her]

If you know you are in love with her and you’ve been waiting for the right moment, just tell her your true feelings. Stop playing games. Don’t wait for her to say it first.

Also, don’t text it or say it over the phone. You don’t have to plan a romantic date or make a huge gesture. That wouldn’t hurt, but it isn’t necessary. Just sharing how you feel, being that open and vulnerable, and taking that risk is grand enough.

[Read: 18 foolproof steps that are guaranteed to make any girl fall in love with you]

Do you love her? Well, love is a fleeting and miraculous thing. Hopefully, it only comes once in a lifetime and stays for a lifetime.