13 Must-Follow Rules of Texting a Guy for the Response You Want

You just exchanged numbers with the guy you like—great! But before you start texting him, here are some rules of texting a guy.

You finally exchanged numbers with the guy you have a crush on. It’s a pretty big step. Who knows what will happen! When you like someone, it’s easy to take things too seriously and apply unnecessary pressure on yourself. These rules of texting a guy will help you navigate it and get the response you want!

I had a big crush on this one guy, and texting him was torture for me. I would re-read my texts one-thousand times and double-check with my friends if what I said was funny or witty. It was exhausting. If I were more secure in myself and didn’t place my crush on a pedestal, things would have gone much smoother.

[Read: How to be emotionally independent and stop using others for happiness]

13 rules of texting a guy that make all the difference

You have his number, but that’s just the beginning. However, your experience doesn’t have to end up exactly like mine. I really hope it doesn’t. So, I included a couple of rules of texting a guy to help you successfully text him. You don’t need to follow them strictly, but they’re a good guide to follow when you feel like you’re in over your head.

Just remember, he’s a human being. He’s just like you. Don’t get it in your head that he’s above you, because he’s not. Let’s get to it. [Read: Totally crushing? Must-know secrets to text a guy you like]

#1 Remember, he’s just a guy. You came here to get some help, I understand. I did the same thing when I was single. I needed guidance and help when it came to talking to guys. But, you need to remember, he’s just a guy.

Don’t get it in your head that he’s above you. There’s no need to take this too seriously. Take it easy on yourself and be kind. [Read: How to stop being shy around your crush and get their attention]

#2 Text him according to his effort. Here’s the thing, often, we’ll do more than what the other person does when it comes to texting. If we like someone, we’ll go the extra mile to text them good morning and ask them how they are. This isn’t bad, but he has to meet you halfway.

If he doesn’t text you, don’t text him. If he only gives you one-word answers, why should you ask him questions to get to know him? Give him what he gives you.

 #3 Are you enjoying the conversation? This is something you should check in with yourself. You’re talking to a guy you like, but are you actually enjoying the conversation? It’s easy to get wrapped up in the thoughts of this guy without realizing you actually don’t like him as much as you think. Is there a connection? Be honest with yourself. [Read: Falling for someone? The biggest signs of an emotional connection] 

#4 You don’t need to text him eight hours later. I know you want to look like you’re really busy, so you send him a text hours later. Really, you don’t have to do that. You also don’t have to text him 30 seconds after he texts you.

Text him when you feel like texting him, there’s no rule to this. Do what feels right, and not because you want him to think you’re so busy.

#5 Don’t overthink your texts. I know you want to text him the perfect message, but that doesn’t mean you should sit on a text for 20 minutes before sending it. Whatever you want to say, say it. The point is, whatever you want to say needs to be genuine to you. If he doesn’t get the joke or disagrees with what you say, that’s okay. 

#6 You don’t need to play games. We’ve been taught that playing games are the only way to get a guy to like us, but that’s not true. You shouldn’t have to play games to get a guy to like you. If he likes you for you, then no games need to be played. [Read: Why playing hard to get with a guy is pointless] 

#7 Don’t be pushy. You want to hang out with him, and that’s great. If you asked him out and he can’t go, that’s okay. Don’t be pushy and pressure him into doing anything. If he chooses to go on a date with you, awesome. If he doesn’t want to, then don’t waste your time. 

#8 You don’t always need to be talking to each other. Yesss. Can we say that again for the people in the back? You don’t need to always be talking to each other. It’s okay to talk every other day or every three days. Constant communication doesn’t necessarily mean you will be more connected. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. It’s corny but true. [Read: How guys text when they like you – 15 things they do differently]

#9 Know when to end the conversation. You don’t need to keep talking to him all day and night. It’s perfectly okay to end the conversation and go on living your life. If you feel the conversation is dying, end it. You can start the conversation up again later that day or the day after. It’s okay; silence isn’t a bad thing.

#10 Focus on your tone. When it comes to texting, it’s easy to miscommunicate because we can’t see the other person’s face while they’re talking. So, it’s easy to mistake a sentence as being something other than what it is. Read your message out loud to double-check if there’s a chance for him to take it the wrong way.

#11 Go easy on the emojis. Everyone enjoys emojis, but you don’t need to have your message an entire sentence of emojis. When people see messages like that… it’s not exactly a turn on. Use emojis to show sarcasm or a joke, but don’t go crazy with them. Use them within reason, regardless if the text is for a guy you like or not.

#12 Don’t keep the relationship via text. If you like this guy, you don’t want to keep this relationship only on text. You want the relationship to evolve and grow into something. So, after some time, focus on trying to meet each other for coffee or dinner. If you like him, there’s nothing wrong by asking him out. [Read: How to ask a guy out over text and get the answer you want]

#13 If you’re not into him, let him know. You may be texting with him and realize that he’s not really the one for you. This is perfectly okay; you don’t need to fall in love with every guy you talk to. But a sign of maturity on your end is letting him know how you feel. It’s hard to tell someone you’re not interested in them, but it cuts the chance for any games to be played.

[Read: Why you shouldn’t ghost someone and the 5 situations where it is okay]

When it comes to knowing the rules of texting a guy, there aren’t really any concrete ones. But there are some things you can do to help you get to where you want to go.