Why Girls Lie & 15 Sneaky Signs to Tell If Your Girlfriend is Lying to Your Face
You have a bad feeling that your girl isn’t being truthful with you. To prove your suspicions, you need to, first of all, understand why she might be lying, and the signs that indicate she is.
At one point or another, we may have been lied to without even knowing it. Sometimes, the little white lies are what people resort to in order to keep others’ feelings from getting hurt. For instance, your girl might say that she’s fine when really she just doesn’t want to talk about what’s bothering her with you. But it’s never fun to be hidden from the truth. So, you need to know the telltale signs that your girl is lying.
When it comes to finding out the truth, it can sometimes be easier to take things at face value instead of prying. But there are times when those lies aren’t so inconsequential. Those little lies may be shielding you from the truth … a truth that might end up hurting you. [Read: 15 types of toxic relationships to stay away from]
Men may become paranoid when their girl is lying to them about something. Is she lying because she’s cheating? Is she lying because she doesn’t want me to find out about something important? Is she lying because she doesn’t respect me enough to think I can handle the truth? The answer may change from situation to situation.
Why girls lie
You might be the most honest person on earth, so you don’t understand why girls would lie – especially your girl.
It’s never easy to accept that someone is lying to us. That’s why you need to know why girls lie in the first place; so that you can determine whether your girl is lying to you or not. While everyone has their own individual reasons, here are some of the most common ones.
1. To hide her past
Many people have done things in their past that they are not proud of, or they are just plain embarrassed to admit.
So, if your girl has slept with a lot of guys and she doesn’t want you to judge her, then she might lie about it. Or, if she’s never had a boyfriend before, she might lie about that too.
Regardless of what it was, she might lie to hide what she may have done in her past. [Read: How to talk about a past relationship and not piss your partner off]
2. She is doing something she shouldn’t be doing
Sadly, a lot of people aren’t fully loyal in their romantic relationships. So, she could be talking to other guys or cheating on you.
Even if she’s remaining faithful to you, she could be doing something like taking drugs or drinking too much. She knows that she’s doing something that you would not approve of, so she lies to hide it from you.
3. She doesn’t want to hurt your feelings
Maybe you’re not the most confident lover, and when you ask if she came or if the sex was good, she might lie if it wasn’t.
You see, she doesn’t want to make you feel bad if she doesn’t need to. So, she thinks it’s easier and kinder just to tell you a lie to make you feel good about yourself.
4. She believes her lies
Unfortunately, some people are just chronic liars. They do it all the time. Maybe they even grew up in a family that always told lies, so it seems normal to her. When people lie all the time, they start to believe their own lies.
Or at the very least, they want the lies to be true so much that they do start to think they are telling the truth, even when they aren’t. [Read: Lying in a relationship – 15 steps to confront a lie and heal the love]
5. She doesn’t want to worry you
Maybe she’s experiencing a health concern, but she doesn’t want you to freak out about it. She might not want you to get all worried if there is no reason to. Or maybe she’s flunking out of school or having financial problems.
Regardless of what it is, she might not want you to worry too much about it if she thinks she can handle it herself.
6. To make herself look good
Some people have such low self-esteem that they feel they need to lie about themselves and their lives to look good to other people.
Just think about how many times people lie on social media to make their lives look perfect. So, she wants to make you proud of her. If she’s not proud of herself, she might make up lies so that you don’t lose respect for her.
7. To test you
A lot of girls aren’t secure in their relationships. Because of this, she might want to test your love or loyalty. Maybe she talks about breaking up with you just to see your reaction. She might not have any intention of doing so, but she wants you to get upset so she can gauge how deep your feelings are for her. [Read: Why do girls play games and test a guy in the early stages of dating?]
How to tell if your girl is lying to you
If you feel it in your gut that your girl is being dishonest with you, you can try checking for these telltale signs.
1. Her lines sound rehearsed and not at all like her
You ask her how her day went and she says something like, “I had lunch with Anne, and then we went to the mall, and then I went home.” If this is how your girlfriend usually tells you about her day, then that’s fine. However, if she’s usually more talkative, this can be a warning sign.
When your girl tells you a story that you doubt, you can check if she’s lying by asking her to tell it again at another time.
If she rigidly retells the story word for word, then it might be a sign that she practiced her lines before talking to you. Why would she feel the need to memorize what she did on a certain day if those events really did happen? [Read: Signs that your relationship is heading downhill]
2. There are inconsistencies in her story
This is for the girl who didn’t have time to rehearse her lines. Little inconsistencies can indicate that she’s not being completely truthful. For instance, the first time she told her story, she said she was with Anne. But then the second time, she mentions that another friend was there with her.
Could she have forgotten that another friend came by, or did she forget her original story? It’s easy to forget minor details when we recount what we did on a certain day. But it can be a little strange if she almost completely changes her story.
3. She panics when you ask
It’s normal for you to ask how your girlfriend’s day went because she is someone you care about, after all. So if she starts to panic, this should get alarm bells ringing in your head. Why would she suddenly panic, if you’re just asking about something completely harmless?
You can tell that she’s panicking if her pitch rises or if she starts talking really fast. Another way to tell is if she’s using exaggerated hand gestures. Afterward, she may act fidgety or she may start to become paranoid that you asked, to the point that she anxiously tries to change the subject.
4. She gets mad when you ask
This is one of the surefire ways to tell if your girl is lying. She’ll say things like, “I already told you!”. Though in her defense, it can be pretty tiring to repeat something you’ve already said. However, if it would only take a couple of words to answer your question, why would she be mad?
Being mad or defensive when you ask a question does two things. One, it can make you avoid the topic, because it clearly bothers her, which would then leave you wondering why.
Two, getting mad can give her enough time to change the topic and accuse you of prying too much into what she does. If she’s lying, she’s counting on these two consequences so she won’t have to repeat her lie. [Read: Tips to fight fair in a relationship]
5. There are either too many details or too few
With this sign that your girlfriend is lying to you, it is also one to look for if she’s lying over text. This would depend entirely on how she usually tells you things and texts you.
While some ladies like to mention all the little details, others hold off on the details to deliver the point quickly. Now, we’re assuming that you’re well versed in how your girlfriend usually talks.
If she’s the type to include tons of details, and she’s suddenly going for brevity, something may be amiss. On the other hand, if she usually tells pretty straight-to-the-point stories, it can be a bit strange when she starts mentioning tiny inconsequential details. [Read: 18 ingenious ways to catch a cheating partner]
6. She looks away a lot
When people lie, they usually don’t want to look you straight in the eye because it’s easier for you to catch them lying. What they usually do is look away or shift their eyes from one object to another.
People also tend to look away when they feel uncomfortable. Lying to a loved one is, of course, uncomfortable. So looking away is a person’s way of trying to deflect your judging gaze, so they don’t waver when they lie.
Now, your woman doesn’t have to keep her eyes fixed on you the entire time she’s telling you something. But if she spends about 90% of the conversation looking away, then you may need to start double-checking what she’s saying. But when she looks into your eyes too much … [Read: 15 ways a pathological liar hurts and confuses you with their lies]
7. She looks you straight in the eye
Have you ever felt like you were hypnotized by your boss when they were telling you to do something? Notice how they would look you straight in the eye and practically use their gaze to make you do what they say? This tactic can also work when someone is lying.
When someone looks you straight in the eye, it can be off-putting and it can make you drop your guard. When your girlfriend does this, she may be trying to convince you to believe her tale.
It’s possible that she thinks looking away may make her appear weak and unsure of her story. So she’s doing the opposite to make you think that there’s no reason to doubt what she’s saying.
8. She’s preventing you from double-checking
This is one of the easiest ways to tell if your girl is lying. You may already have it in your mind that she’s lying about something. In order to prove that she is, you’ll probably try to do a little fact-checking. You try to check her phone, but she always has it on her person or she has protected it with a passcode. [Read: How to build trust after cheating – things the ex-cheater MUST do]
Let’s say you guessed the right passcode, and you start snooping through her messages and pictures. All you find is an empty inbox and an empty photo album.
Now that her phone isn’t an option, you test your hacker abilities and try to check her Facebook when she’s not looking. But, alas! All her messages have been deleted or she changed her password. With nothing to see on her phone and Facebook, what other options do you have?
You try to ask her friends where she’s been, but they suspiciously don’t reply to you even if they’re online. Well, that’s three strikes now.
We think it’s time that you have a talk with your girlfriend and ask her if she’s hiding something from you. Who knows, she might cave in and admit that something is going on that she doesn’t want you to know about.
Final thoughts
Lying to people is never okay. If you suspect that your girl is lying to you, then you are probably frustrated and concerned. But at the end of the day, all you can do is look for the red flags. Eventually, people who lie will trip themselves up and get caught in the lie.
[Read: How you can get over trust issues in your relationship]
Being lied to can be a prelude to other hurtful things your girlfriend can do to you. Check for these red flags or use them to tell if your girl is lying. It’s better to nip the issue in the bud before things spiral out of control.
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