Spanking Women: How & When to Spank a Bad, Bad Girl to Arouse Her

Learning how to spank a girl the right way could be the key to boosting your sex life as a couple. If it’s something she’s into, give it a try tonight!

Spanking women has long been something we have seen in comedy films from back in the day. But, it has actually managed to find itself in the modern-day too. But, these days it’s less of a comedic move and more of a sexy one. Many women find spanking to be a huge turn-on, but there are many men who simply don’t know how to do it the right way. By learning how to spank a girl in the sexiest of ways, you’ll be able to give her a seriously sexy time and probably a night of fun for you too!

Spanking during sex is seriously sexy – especially for women. It’s also just a natural act that men tend to do when they’ve got their woman from behind.

It’s exciting, fun, primal, and really increases any sexual pleasure that’s happening in the moment. Do all women enjoy it? No, but many do.

Having a conversation with your partner beforehand will tell you which side of that argument she’s on.

However, there’s also something to be said for those of you who don’t know how or when to spank women and do it right. If you make a mistake and just smack her butt too hard, you could ruin the mood for everyone involved – which also ruins your chances of getting with her again. [Read: Domestic discipline – The newbie’s guide to a sexy spanky start]

What exactly is spanking?

In a sexual sense, spanking women means that you slap your partner on the buttocks. This can be done jokingly but with a sexy hint when you walk past her in the house, or you can make it a more sexualized experience.

In this case, the woman would lay over your lap and you would expose the bare skin of her buttock, slapping it repeatedly.

Many people who enjoy the actual giving of spanks find pleasure in the slapping noise and the slight redness of the skin after the hand makes contact. For those who receive spanking, it’s the fine line between pleasure and pain and the slightly taboo vibe going on. By learning how to spank a girl the right way, you’ll both get the best experience. [Read: Sexy spanking – 10 naughty tips to do it the right way]

Why do we need to be careful with spanking?

As long as both of you consent to spanking, then there’s nothing wrong with it at all. What you do with the confines of your relationship is your business. Learning how to spank a girl does require knowing her limitations, however.

You don’t want to actually hurt her. Instead, you want to turn her on to the point where she’s desperate for things to go further and for the two of you to end up in bed, or elsewhere if you can’t make it there!

Having a safe word is a good idea with anything pleasure/pain-related. Decide upon the word beforehand and if she starts to feel like it’s getting a bit too much, or perhaps you feel like you’re not enjoying it, say the word and everything stops immediately.

Spanking women, or of course, being spanked by a woman, can be done with the flat of the hand, or with a paddle. Beginners should probably opt for the flat of a hand because a paddle can be a little harsh for the first time spankee! When starting out learning how to spank a girl, stick to the basics first. [Read: How to be a dominant – 12 steps to take control and lead in bed]

Why does spanking feel so good?

Some of you may be wondering why spanking feels good. You’re probably thinking, “but wouldn’t it just hurt?” Clearly, you’ve never been spanked during sex before. So it’s easy to understand your reservations for why you would want to spank a woman.

But there’s actually a reason spanking feels so amazing. Not only is there that primal feel about it. But, spanking actually causes just the right amount of pain that releases endorphins and dopamine into your system as a means to subdue the pain of it.

The results, however, are more than just getting rid of the pain. With dopamine and endorphins being the ‘feel good’ hormones, you actually get a slight happy high from being spanked.

These chemicals that are normally present when we feel happy are also released whenever we feel pain. That means that yes, spanking is painful, but it also makes us feel GREAT!

When done right, spanking should never actually be painful per se. It should be a little uncomfortable which then gives way to pleasure. If you’re actually hurting her, you need to pull back and she needs to be able to tell you to calm things down. [Read: Naughty is nice – The couples step-by-step guide to erotic spanking]

How and when you should be spanking

Now, you can’t just go around spanking women and expecting them all to enjoy it. There are certain things you have to do. And there are certain ways you have to do it that make for a pleasurable spanking experience.

Spanking women can be really sexy, fun, and add a level to your sex life that you’re probably missing – but only if you do it the right way.

If you want to test the waters and see if spanking women is something you’re into, you’ll have to know just when and how to do it right. [Read: 15 dirty ways to have the sexiest rough sex ever!]

Knowing when you can spank a woman is one of the most important things about actually spanking them. If you do it at the wrong time, you can fail altogether at creating that sexy mood and you can actually just turn her off.

This is when you should really pull out that whipping hand and go to work. Of course, you should never actually try spanking women at all unless she’s told you she wants it. Not all women enjoy spanking, so don’t expect it to be a given.

1. Spanking can be dne during heavy foreplay

Don’t start out the foreplay by spanking someone unless you have been with them and already know they like it.

But if you’re engaging in some hot and heavy foreplay, it’s the perfect opportunity for you to spank her. It will increase her desires and make her want you even more. [Read: 10 foreplay moves men HAVE to do to their ladies]

2. Spanking women during role play

If you’re role playing in certain scenarios, spanking just makes a lot of sense.

Whether you’re the professor and she’s the naughty, failing student or she’s a prisoner and you’re her guard, spanking can be a natural way to add reality to these fun scenarios. [Read: The sexual roleplay guide for complete beginners]

3. Only try spanking when she asks you to

Some women know exactly what they want from you and will tell you to spank them. This is really all the say-so you need and you can go to town right away. [Read: What feminists want to hate in bed, but totally love!]

4. Spank her from behind

Being behind a woman during sex and not spanking her is just a lost opportunity for fun. If you have her from behind and are feeling like you want to spank her, you should go for it because there won’t really be a more appropriate time.

Of course, that should only be done if you know she likes it and wants you to try it.

Spanking women from other positions can work, but none are nearly as accessible as when you’re behind them and their booty is raised in the air. This is the perfect time to spank her the right way. [Read: Why the doggie style may be the best sex position ever]

5. Talk about limits before learning how to spank a girl

Depending on how far you’re willing to take spanking, there may be some limits to think about. If the two of you get together beforehand and you both know sex is going to get intense, you should always go over your limits with her before spanking.

As before, coming up with a safe word may even work to your advantage as well. Only after you know how far you’re allowed to take things should you begin spanking women.

6. Start spanking lightly

Going right into the big swings may seem like a good idea because you’re so eager, but you should always start lightly at first. Not only will this increase the tension and sexual desire on her part, but you’ll also be able to warm up and gauge her reaction much better this way. [Read: 15 painfully embarrassing things that can go wrong during sex]

7. Keep an eye on her reactions

Now that you’ve started lightly, you can proceed to a few harder smacks. But in order to be spanking women the right way, you should always gauge their reaction. Then you can decipher what’s too much and when they want more.

Pay attention to how much they tense up and even their facial expression. Any excessive amount of tension and a pained look on her face is telling you to tone it down and not spank her so hard.

Also, listen to her words and sounds – she should not sound uncomfortable or like she’s not enjoying herself. She should be moaning in a good way! [Read: BDSM tips and tricks for curious first timers]

8. Spontaneous spanking is fine, as long you know she’s into it

The woman you’re spanking should be surprised by your spanking, but not so taken aback that it actually scares her.

This can also have a lot to do with timing and how forcefully you’re spanking her too. So choose an opportune moment and keep the pressure at a medium level. [Read: 10 often-overlooked sex moves every woman will love in bed]

9. Rub the area before and after spanking

Not only is this a nice little warning, but it also soothes the area post spanking and makes it all the more pleasurable. This is also a sexy way you can transition into other positions or give yourself a break between positions. Of course, you’ll enjoy the feel of her warm, bare skin under your hand and you’ll get a real kick out of it too.

It also just feels really good for the woman you’re spanking to get that extra caressing and soothing to her red and sore behind. After all, learning how to spank a girl is about looking after her throughout. [Read: Massaging your partner to orgasm – 20 pivotal do’s and don’ts]

10. Show your confidence

Learning how to spank a girl shouldn’t be done by a shy and hesitant hand. You have to be confident in your spanking and demanding. You should be taking on a whole new persona when you start spanking women.

Confidence will also take all the tension and anticipation to the next level. When a man who is in charge and demanding starts spanking a woman, she will abide by whatever rules he tells her.

She will also feel safer in the hands of someone who acts like he knows what he’s doing.

The whole point of spanking is that you need to show your partner that you’re in control, they’re safe in your hands, and that you’re going to show them a good time.

Then, they can relax and enjoy the experience without always being on edge. That’s exactly what spanking should be – enjoyable.

[Read: The top 10 taboo sex topics we love but don’t talk about]

Spanking women may seem like a mindless act that you indulge in during sex because you think it’s hot. But, there’s so much more to it than that. By learning how to spank a girl, you’ll know when and how to spank women and do it right.