Missionary Sex Position: What It Is and 32 Secrets & Variations to Make It Hot!

Do you think that the missionary sex position is boring? It doesn’t have to be. Here are ways to spice up this position to make it a lot more exciting.

If there’s one sex position that has the worst reputation, it’s this one. Too many people shut down missionary sex like it’s the worst, most dull way to get it on. Those people, however, just aren’t doing it right.

Missionary sex can be extremely satisfying if you know how to make it better. Understandably, it can get monotonous if you do it the same way every single time you have sex. It can also seem less than exciting if it’s the ONLY thing you do during sex.

[Read: 46 sizzling sex life secrets to spice up your bedroom and leave you horny 24/7]

What is the missionary sex position? 

The missionary sex position is when the penetrator is on top and the receiver is on the bottom. It’s typically associated with straight couples, but anyone can do it regardless of gender.

It’s a good position for getting momentum going and keeping thrusts consistent. Also, it’s often considered the most romantic position because you’re face-to-face with your partner and can kiss, touch, or stroke each other’s hair. [Read: Most common sex positions and sexy ways to spice them up to expert level]

Myths about the missionary position

While it may be a popular sex position, the missionary has some myths that surround it too. Here are a couple of the most common ones:

1. No variation

Most people think that the missionary is only with the woman on the bottom and the man on top. They don’t know that there are a lot of variations to it. And you will learn about these later.

2. It’s not exciting

If a couple is into kinky sex, they might think that the missionary position is boring and lacking in imagination.

But this isn’t true. Any sex position can be exciting if you just try different things with it. [Read: Vanilla sex – what it is and 26 hot ways to go from boring to OMFG in bed]

Benefits of the missionary position

Believe it or not, there are some benefits to the missionary position. Some of them include:

1. It can allow for heightened intimacy

The missionary position is a romantic one, maybe the most romantic one. This is because it allows for eye-to-eye contact between the couple and allows them to kiss easily. It also helps the woman trust her partner more. 

2. It lets you focus on pleasure

The woman doesn’t need to do much in this position because she’s the one being penetrated. This can be very freeing for people who are self-conscious during sex or don’t want to feel the pressure to “perform.” [Read: Sexual anxiety – 25 secrets to not feel nervous about having sex and enjoy it]

So, lying back and just focusing on how good the sex feels and how nice it is to be close to your partner can be very liberating for some people.

3. It can be used as a tantra tool 

For those who want to explore a more meditative way of having sex, the missionary position is the way to do it.

This is because this position can be maintained for a long period of time without much effort. It also involves a lot of skin and sustained eye contact. 

How to do the missionary sex position

First, you should find a flat surface, such as a bed, floor, couch, or even the back seat of a car. [Read: Male G-spot – what it is and 28 positions, tips, and secrets to find and stimulate it]

The woman lies on her back with her feet flat, knees raised, and legs wide apart. Then, the man goes down on his knees in the space between her legs. Obviously, this position can be done by anyone, not just straight couples. [Read: Lesbian sex – 23 positions, girl-on-girl sex secrets, myths, and other must-knows]

This means that the penis or sex toy is aligned with the vaginal or anal opening. From there, he enters her and begins to thrust. However, both the man and the woman can thrust in this position, but traditionally, it comes from the man.

Switching things up in the bedroom is better for everyone

No matter which position you do, doing it every single time the entire time will get boring after a while. [Read: 34 hand job tips, secrets, and positions to give a hand job that drives him wild]

Your body will be used to it and it won’t have the same effect anymore. It might feel good but not quite as great as it should.

And you’ll just be bored. The less exciting sex is, the more you’ll avoid doing it. In fact, you’ll find that getting yourself off is more fun since it’s something different. 

You need to switch things up in the bedroom to make it feel better and to be more engaged. [Read: 46 sizzling sex life secrets to spice up your bedroom and leave you horny 24/7]

How to make missionary sex a lot more exciting and pleasurable

For those who do it right, missionary sex can be very powerful. Hitting the right angles in this position can do an awful lot for both of you.

Here’s what you can do to make this seemingly boring sex position the highlight of every romp in the sheets.

1. Stick a pillow under the girl’s butt

This is the best way you can make the missionary sex position feel even better. Basically, doing this creates a more direct angle for the guy to hit that G-spot. 

Just place a nice-sized pillow under her butt and hips so it lifts them up. You’ll both love this position a whole lot more when there’s more pleasure involved. [Read: Shaking orgasm – what it is and feels like and 15 steps to experience it yourself]

2. Use some toys

Why can’t you just throw a toy in the mix? Missionary is one of the best positions to use a toy because there’s so much access. The guy just has to be on his knees upright and he can use one all he wants on the girl.

And ladies, don’t be afraid to request this. If you’re not going to put a pillow under your butt, the least your man can do is throw a toy into the mix. 

Give that clit some stimulation and it’ll become your favorite position. [Read: Must-have sex toys for naughty first-timers]

3. Make it the warm-up

If you’re sick of missionary, just use it to warm up. It’s great right off the bat because it hits all the spots and gives the guy every visual he could want *aside from that booty*.

Get started after some foreplay and move into something else. You don’t have to do missionary the entire time for it to be effective and feel good.

4. Make it the finisher

Instead of starting this way, finish with it! Ladies, if you put a pillow under those hips, it’s the perfect finisher simply because it’ll allow you to actually finish. [Read: Slow sex – 16 steamy reasons it’s so sexy and tips to experience it yourself]

Plus, it has everything a guy could want. He can watch every inch of the girl and has a perfect place for his load if he decides to pull out. 

Not to mention the fact that this position just feels great for him.

5. Bring her legs up

Switch up missionary a little bit by simply bringing the girl’s legs up so they’re draped over the man’s shoulders. [Read: 60 secrets to make a woman orgasm and master the art of making a girl cum hard]

It might not technically be the missionary anymore, but it’s a great transition from it and it’s still a form of it.

6. Keep your bodies pushed up against each other

What’s better than the feeling of skin on skin? You can’t get this level of flesh contact with many other positions and it’s truly a shame.

Why? Because there are tons of nerve endings in your skin that can only add to the sensations. That’s not even to mention the pheromones. [Read: Intense sex – 17 pleasurable secrets and moves to make love with real passion]

When your skin touches that much, the pheromones can drive you both wild with a primal need that’ll fuel your sexcapades.

7. Use some fun lube

Do you ever use lube? Most people avoid it out of embarrassment or just because they see it as an unnecessary hassle.

The truth? Lube can be incredible when having missionary sex because it adds extra sensation down there.

This is especially true if you choose a lube that has a certain effect. There are ones that make the sensations even more powerful, create a warming effect, and more. [Read: How to use lube to liven up your sex life instantly]

Try some new ones out and missionary will be your new favorite position.

8. Have the girl wrap her legs around the guy like a pretzel

This may not do much more than pull him in deeper, but it sure is erotic.

There aren’t too many other positions where the woman can have such a possessive power over the man in this way. Plus, it’ll make the man feel wanted and needed—a turn-on in its own right.

9. Use some restraints

Want to make things kinkier? Add some handcuffs and pin down the woman so she can’t move at all. This is fun for both the guy and the girl. [Read: 26 sexy secrets to be dominant in bed, control your partner, and not hurt them]

He can do whatever he pleases and the sensations will be even more powerful for her because she can’t get away. It’s also just erotic and sexy as hell.

10. Use blindfolds

Do you know what makes pleasure even better? When your senses are heightened. When you lose your sight, your other senses sharpen a bit and you can feel and hear things more powerfully.

That means missionary sex can get really sexy by just placing a blindfold on someone. Or you can get extra naughty and have both restraints and a blindfold.

11. Get a cock ring

If you want your man harder and bigger, get a cock ring. This is more fun for him because it makes him a lot more sensitive, due to the increased blood flow. 

And because of that extra blood flow, he’ll be even bigger, which means he can reach that g-spot a hell of a lot easier.

12. Talk dirty

You can spice up any sex position with some dirty talk. If you’re new to it, just ease in and start by describing what feels good. Then you can go a little bit deeper and really make missionary sex extra steamy.

Being face-to-face makes talking dirty even sexier. You can easily whisper in each other’s ear while going at it. Talk about kinky! [Read: 35 dirty things to say to a girl to leave her wet with desire]

13. Find the C.A.T.

The coital alignment technique, or C.A.T., is a small adjustment that allows for maximum clitoral stimulation during missionary sex. While he’s on top, she should scooch down a few inches until the base of his penis is aligned with her clit and pointing slightly downward. 

The woman should wrap her legs around his thighs, and then press her genitals together and rock back and forth. Neither of you will be disappointed. [Read: Turn offs for guys – 72 physical, dating, and sexual put offs all men notice and dislike]

14. Take it to the head

It sounds strange, but dangling the woman’s head and shoulders off of the bed has been known to intensify orgasms. Start by having traditional missionary sex.

As the woman feels herself coming, slide the upper portion of her body over the edge of the bed.

The rush of blood to the head will give her a euphoric tingle from head to toe. Be mindful of any lightheadedness or dizziness, though. If she stays in this position for too long, she may pass out.

15. Pull it in

If both of you would like to explore her lusty depths, bring her knees into her chest the next time she’s on her back.

Once he enters her, rest her calves on his shoulders, have him prop himself up on his hands, and enjoy the ride. [Read: 31 new things to try in bed at least once with your lover]

In this position, he’s in control, which can be nice for the woman every once in a while. He’ll stroke places that she didn’t know she had and, if she’s up for it, transition seamlessly into anal. Who knew the missionary sex position could be so adventurous?

16. Switch your style up

If she’s tired of the same old stroke, the man should change some of his thrusting patterns. When you’ve been with someone for a long time, sex can become a bit routine. 

Something as simple as mixing in a few teasing thrusts with his usual long strokes can keep things interesting between the sheets. [Read: Reasons to have sex every single day]

Women have to be proactive in their own pleasure. That said, she can always take control by grabbing her honey by the butt, pulling him deep inside, and grinding against him until he hits the spot. 

He’ll get a kick out of the way she takes charge, and she’ll get an orgasm.

17. Hop in the whip

Sometimes, it’s not what you do, but where you do it. It sounds a bit juvenile, but having sex in the back seat of your car can be just as hot now as it was when you were a teenager. [Read: 46 sexy secrets to please and pleasure a man in bed and leave him aroused 24/7]

The ever-present elements of danger and surprise are still major turn-ons. Maybe you’ll get caught in a compromising position, but that’s half the fun!

The woman should lie on her back in the back seat and have the man bend her knees and climb on top. Then the woman should place her feet on the ceiling of the car for leverage, and take each other for a spin. 

The resistance between her legs and the roof provides a tension that compliments her lover’s strokes perfectly. [Read: 17 condom types, their secrets, and ways to spice up your sex life with them]

18. Keep it under “lock and key” 

Sorry to disappoint you, but there are no handcuffs involved this time. 

“Lock and key” is actually a missionary remix that puts the woman in complete control of her pleasure. It’s simple, satisfying, and spicier than you may expect.

The woman should lay on her back, just as she would during missionary sex. The man should then kneel between her legs, bend at the waist, and prop himself up on straightened arms. [Read: Aggressive sex – what it is, why people like it, and 23 secrets to give it a try]

Now, the woman should wrap her legs around his hips, and then lift her hips, and guide him inside of her. See? That wasn’t hard at all!

This variation is cool because that luscious leg lock you’ve got going lets her control how deep her lover thrusts. 

She’s in an excellent position to show him how well she winds. Also, from this angle, the man can get an exquisite view of her body, which he’ll definitely appreciate. [Read: Meaningless sex – what it is, how to have it, and 16 signs you’re ready for it]

19. Change up the scenery

One of the reasons that a lot of people think that the missionary sex position is boring is because it usually takes place in the bedroom… on the bed. While there is nothing wrong with that, it can get a bit routine and robotic.

So, in order to make this sex position more exciting, change up the scenery! Do it in your kitchen, on the floor, or on the couch. You can even take it outside your house and do it somewhere else.

If you’re risk-averse, you can go away and book a hotel or bed and breakfast and have sex there. [Read: Sexy words – 23 seductive words, do’s & don’ts, to make dirty talk sound erotic]

Or if you’re more of a wild child, you can be more daring and do it somewhere in public or outside. Just don’t get arrested for public indecency!

20. Engage other erogenous zones

Another thing that typically happens when a couple has been together a long time is that they don’t really explore each other’s erogenous zones anymore. But just because you’re in the missionary sex position doesn’t mean you can’t do this too.

Many people’s necks, ears, shoulders, backs, breasts, and stomachs are great erogenous zones to tease and play with. [Read: The most arousing erogenous zones for women all men should know]

Ask your partner what they like the best, and then try to incorporate the touching of these zones as much as you can during sex.

21. Squeeze your legs

The missionary sex position doesn’t always have to be with the woman’s legs wide open. So, the woman should try to squeeze her legs together as hard as she can.

What this will do is put more pressure and friction on his penis and will give him greater pleasure. It also creates more sensations for the woman as well. [Read: The nooner – what it is, how it works, and 22 tips to enjoy a sexy siesta]

22. Go slowly

Of course, sex can be hot and heavy. And when that happens, sex can get rushed because both people are feeling horny and want to have an intense romp in the sack.

But instead, try to go slowly. Not only will this will make sex a lot more romantic, but it also will “turn down” your brain a bit more so you can focus more on the physical sensations and pleasure.

23. Lift one leg up

This is also known as the “impaled” or the “schulachitaka” missionary sex position in the literature of Kamasutra. It allows for very deep penetration. [Read: Pull out method – 28 pros, cons, and truths about the withdrawal method]

In this position, the woman lifts one leg up, which gives the couple the ability to get pleasure with various angles that lead to better sex and more extreme orgasms.

This creates enough space for the man to rub her clit with his penis to provide her with even more pleasure.

24. Flip over 

This position is knowns as the lizard. It’s a little more than the classic missionary—flipped upside down to put the woman on top.

The man lays on his back with his legs together while she lies down facing him, her legs spread over his hips.

Lying down like this forces both of you to focus on gliding and grinding. The cowgirl and missionary can get loud with the bed banging, but the lizard is more discreet and quiet. [Read: The subtle ways to tell your neighbors to stop having loud, noisy sex]

25. Do a bridge 

For this position, he lifts her lower body up off the bed while he wraps his arms around her waist for support. This simple bridge can make the missionary position feel incredible. 

Alternately, the woman’s lower body can be elevated by a pillow, blanket, or foam wedge while the man kneels between her legs and enters her.

26. Spreader bar

A spreader bar is a BDSM bondage device in which the woman’s legs are spread and maintained in an open position. [Read: BDSM tips and tricks for curious first timers]

As far as restraints go, it’s not only a good way to restrain the woman, but they are also a way to manipulate her body more.

In the missionary-style position, he can use the bar to push her legs backward and get some good G-spot action for her.

27. The starfish

First, you can lie on a bed, floor, or any flat surface. Then, she spreads like a starfish while he avoids contact with the rest of her body except for their genitals.

It’s called the starfish position due to the fact that the man’s limbs are seen from above or from the woman’s point of view. Plus, with her lying on her back with her legs closed and straight is easier to achieve orgasm.

[Read: How to have rough sex and 15 dirty moves to have the sexiest time ever]

Missionary sex isn’t nearly as boring as you think it is or as people have made it seem. If you really want to make it feel the best and enjoy it together, these tips will help.