How to Make Him Want You Back: The Art of Getting a Guy to Miss You

If you’re wondering how to make him want you back, there are a few ideas that work like a charm. And it all starts with understanding a guy’s mind.

Ending a relationship is one of life’s toughest lessons. No matter whether it is your decision or not, it is still an extremely hard thing to go through. And sometimes, we can’t help but regret a decision. Now if you’re wondering how to make him want you back, you should know that it’s not a bad idea, but only if you’ve weighed all the options first.

[Read: 20 questions to ask your ex after a breakup to get closure]

Do you really think you should get back with him?

Don’t misunderstand this truth. Of course, you miss him, and of course, you want him back. But keep your emotions aside for a minute and ask yourself the real question – Do you really want him back in your life for good?

It’s one thing to miss a guy you broke up with, but it’s a completely different story to get back with him just because your life feels a bit empty right now. Breakups hurt, but the mature thing to do is to be honest about it. There’s nothing wrong with missing him or even feeling like you could never recover again because your heart’s broken.

But don’t ever rush back into his arms again just because you’re feeling lonely. Always ask yourself the tough questions, and be mature about it.

You can always love someone and yet know full well that they don’t belong in your life.

You can miss him, pine over him, and cry your heart out – all the while knowing that the breakup was the right thing to do for your life and future.

If you do decide to pursue him so he can pursue you right back, you need to know that the problems that caused the breakup can be corrected and the relationship can be fixed.

If you don’t fix what broke you, you will break up again, and you’ll feel much worse too.

[Read: How to get your ex-boyfriend back after a regretful parting]

The big secret to making a guy want you back and miss you

If you’ve given this a considerable thought, and know with complete certainty that your broken relationship can be fixed, and whatever the problems, it can all be overcome, that’s a good start.

Now that you’re sure you want him, and are mature about your feelings, let’s talk about how to make him want you back and miss you again. [Read: Why your ex crosses your mind from time to time]

Honestly, it all comes down to one thing, desirability.

If you want to make him miss you and want you back, you need to make him desire you again. His desire for you must overcome any negative feelings he’s associated with you because of the breakup.

He’s now your ex, and he’s probably trying to get over you as you’re reading this. So it’s important that you turn things around for him if you want to know how to make him want you back. At first, you need to make it hard for him to stop thinking of you. And next, you need to find your way into his heart again.

If you can make him desire you and want you all over again, that’s pretty much the first and most important step here. Of course, beyond that comes reconciliation and overcoming your problems as a couple. But first, you need to make him want you and want you badly all over again.

[Read: Does my ex miss me? 23 signs your ex is clearly not over you yet]

Should you contact him immediately or play it cool?

This is an important part to consider. If you texted him right now and told him you’d want to get back together, would he be willing to give the relationship another chance?

If the breakup is fresh, chances are, all you need to do is text him a heartfelt message and let him know that you miss him. If he misses you, and you miss him, chances are, it’ll all be fixed and you both would be together again in no time.

Remember, if you can avoid playing games, and be honest with each other, that’s always the better way to solve a problem – with communication and honesty. [Read: How to get your ex back and convince them it’s the right thing to do]

But if you’re certain that your ex-boyfriend isn’t interested in getting back with you, either because you broke his heart, or it’s been a while, then you definitely need to play it cool and rouse his interest in you before you reach out to him. This is also the case if he’s already dating someone else *do you really want to break up a happy couple just because you’re bored?!*

If you’re reading this now, chances are, you’re not sure he’d say yes to gett back together, so you want to do the right thing before you get in touch with him. If that’s you, read on, and we’ll tell you everything you need to know!

[Read: When does an ex start to miss you? The bittersweet truth revealed]

How to make him want you back and miss being with you

If you broke his heart, it might be tough to convince him to give you another chance. Or it might be the other way around. Perhaps your ex-boyfriend felt like it wasn’t working and broke up with you. And now you are desperate to show him what a huge mistake he made. Whatever your reasons for wanting your ex back, if you do, then we are here to help!

Follow these steps, and this will seriously up your odds in making him want you back!

1. Stay away from him for now

While this might sound counterintuitive, just think about it. Absence makes the heart grow fonder as they say and never a truer word has been spoken!

Keeping your distance from your ex is the only way they start to miss you. If you are always there or constantly calling and texting them, they know they can have you back at the drop of a hat, and that won’t appeal to them.

Reverse psychology often works wonders in a situation like this. Even though we know it is torture, don’t be tempted to pick up that phone, send them a text, or just ‘happen’ to bump into them right outside their home even though you don’t live anywhere near them.

At the same time, staying away gives you the time you need to increase your desirability in their eyes. If they can’t see you, they’ll think of you. And if they think of you, they’ll miss you. [Read: How to make your ex miss you – 17 subtle ways to make them want you]

2. Look after number one

Breakups are the perfect time to take a good hard look at yourself and figure out what you want from your life. Okay, we know you want your ex back, but what else?

Assess what went wrong in the relationship. If you want to know how to make him want you back, ask yourself if there’s anything you need to change about your behavior or your lifestyle.

If you worked extra long hours, or your partner didn’t like you partying so much, why not work on these areas and prove to him that you can in fact change?

3. Get in shape

Yup, this is kind of shallow. But hey, if it helps you win him back, and makes you a lot healthier and fitter too, that’s a double whammy, right?

It’s fair to say that being in a long-term relationship often takes its toll on your figure. Being totally comfortable with someone else is such a wonderful feeling. However, relaxing your diet and enjoying all those cozy nights snuggled up in front of the TV with takeout means those pounds really piled on.

Getting a ton of exercise and eating really healthily focuses your mind on something else apart from the breakup. It also gets you looking fit and toned, so the next time you see your ex, you really show them what they are missing! [Read: How to look sexy, feel sexy and be sexy without ever trying too hard]

4. Act like you don’t care

Change your relationship status on social media if you want to. Or just hide it from people’s view if you want to be mature.

For the first week or so, go radio silent. Try not to be too active on social media and definitely don’t go posting pictures immediately. It becomes way too obvious that you’re just trying to make him jealous or catch his eye.

Be subtle instead. Just take a social media break, and make him wonder what’s going on in your life. [Read: How to look for subtle signs your ex misses you after the breakup]

5. Get back on social media

This move is a cliche, so keep it classy. Don’t unfriend your ex and then start posting loads of pictures of you draped around another guy.

Or worse, don’t go posting quotes about how you’re over the guy, or how you’re so much happier without his dead weight. You don’t want to annoy him, or worse, make him believe you’re being immature and petty!

However, showing your ex that you don’t need him, that you are not sitting at home alone crying yourself to sleep every night, and you are getting on with it and enjoying your life shows him how strong and fun and level-headed you are. He might even start to wonder if he made the wrong decision.

6. Make him jealous

Of course, if you’re looking for ways on how to make him want you back, you could always try to make your ex jealous. This is the oldest trick in the book and can be a little immature, but it does often get great results. Use this guide on the 30 wicked ways to make a guy jealous and get his attention again and chances are, you will see the desired effect!

7. Never act jealous yourself

Whatever tricks he tries to pull, never ever act jealous around him.

As hard as it might be, if you simply ignore him when he tries to make you feel jealous, he won’t know what to do. Always act naturally, keep calm, and remember that you came out of a relationship together. Any new person just cannot compete with the history there.

8. Bump into him “accidentally”

If your common friends are meeting and you know he’s coming too, make sure you don’t cancel on the plans. It’s totally fine to bump into him now and then.

One, it’ll make him realize he still wants you. And two, it’ll give you a chance to reconnect and ask yourself if you still want to get back with him. [Read: 14 things to keep in mind when you bump into your ex]

9. Give him opportunities to “see” you and connect with you

Instagram stories are great for this. Hopefully, both of you are still following each other, which gives you an easy connection to him. Update your stories occasionally, and let him see that you’re out and about, and living your life.

Keep it lively and fun, and sometimes, drop subtle hints that you miss him.

If he gifted you a pair of earrings, post a story where you’re wearing them. If you both had a favorite coffee shop, post a story when you visit the same place. You don’t want to overdo this, so drop a hint once every few days so you’re not overdoing it. You want him to wonder if you’re dropping hints, so never be obvious about it.

And most importantly, posts like these will make him itch to reach out to you, or comment something. And that’s exactly what you want. You want him to desire you, even if he doesn’t make a move to connect with you just yet. [Read: 20 signs your ex misses you and desperately wants you back]

10. Remember his special days

Is it his birthday next week? Text him and wish him. Did he get some good news? Was he recently promoted? Did he put up a post about something he’s proud of? Text him and congratulate him.

You don’t need to text him a big paragraph, just a line or two with an emoji would work perfectly! That perfect balance between more-than-friendly and less-than-lovers is what you should aim for.

Make him wonder if you want to get back together, but never let him know for certain that you’re dying to get back together.

11. Text him something mushy but vague

On a rare occasion, text him something mushy out of the blue.

But do it on the same day when you post a hot photo of yourself on social media. If you know he’s viewed your photo, or if he’s liked it, that’s even better. It’ll always seem like he made the first move by liking your photo, and now you’re only texting him in response.

If you posted a photo of you sitting in a cafe *earlier in the day*, that’s a great excuse to text him something like “I visited ____ today. Wasn’t the same without you. *straight face emoji*”

The goal here is to always take one step, but make him take one step towards you as well. Never make him think you want him already. Instead, always make him believe you’re confused as well. If you do this right, it’ll only make him desire you more. [Read: How to make someone miss you and regret ever leaving your side]

12. Ask him to take his stuff back

Clear out all the stuff your ex left at your house and ask him to take it back.

If he tells you he doesn’t want his things back, you can always tell him that “it hurts too much to see his things.” On one hand, you’re telling him you’re hurt. On the other, you’re getting rid of his memories. That would leave him desiring you all the more!

Make sure there are some pictures of the two of you looking happy and in love. Also, make things smell like you by squirting your perfume or cologne on an item of clothing or even just on the box itself.

This brings back lots of emotional memories for guys. At the same time, it shows you are ready to move on *the old reverse psychology again*, so he’d start to feel like he is losing you and would want to get you back. [Read: 16 signs your ex still thinks of you and wants you back]

13. Get new interests

Do things you always talked about doing, or take up an exciting new hobby that your partner never thought you would be into.

Next time you see them, casually drop this into the conversation. Or just use social media to let others know about your new hobbies and interests.

Showing you are busy is a fantastic way to indicate to your ex that you are moving on with your life. A new interesting hobby shows them there is lots about you they don’t know, which piques their interest and desire to come back for more! [Read: Can you manipulate someone to fall in love with you?]

14. Continue the conversation

When you give your ex some space and the tension and hurt between you calms down, if you still feel as though you want to get back together with them, why not casually stay in touch?

You don’t have to have any kind of conversation about wanting to “stay friends,” when he texts you, or after he responds to your text, just text him again and ask him an open-ended question. Try to keep it very casual.

Don’t ever ask him out for coffee or a drink. And never dive in headfirst and proclaim your undying love for him or gush about how much you miss him, simply keep it calm and friendly.

If you’ve followed all the steps so far, chances are, you’ve upped your desirability level by a huge extent already, and it would only be a matter of time before he asks you if you’d like to meet him! [Read: How to start a conversation with your ex and not make things weird between you two]

15. Don’t let him take advantage of you

If you want your ex back, chances are you feel as though you could do anything for them. Make sure you don’t end up being used by your ex.

If they think they can get you to do whatever they want *for example give you a booty call at 2am then kick you out before breakfast the next day, after you’ve given their flat a quick tidy, of course*, you aren’t going to seem attractive.

[Read: Breakup to makeup: 10 ways to give love a second chance]

When you want to make him want you back, always remember to never make your intentions very obvious. Of course, he should have a clue that you’re interested in him. But the more you make him believe it’s his idea to get back, the harder he’ll fall back in love with you, and the more he’ll desire you all over again.

If you’re trying to figure out how to make him want you back, just follow these steps. And remember, stay assertive, aloof but friendly, healthy, interesting, and calm. Show your ex exactly what they are missing and you will win them back!