How to Fix a Broken Relationship: 19 Tips to Make It Last

Learning how to fix a broken relationship is not a simple task. But with these tips and some patience, you can be happy again.

A lot of couples go through ups and downs in a relationship. It’s only natural, but when things go beyond that, you start to wonder how to fix a broken relationship.

If you and your partner spend more time fighting than happy, your relationship may be broken. When your friends are telling you to move on, your relationship may be broken. But if you aren’t ready to give up on the relationship, here is how to fix a broken relationship.

A broken relationship is not healthy. The relationship may have been healthy at one point, but you can’t turn back. All you can do is move forward.

[Read: How to rebuild a relationship that’s falling apart in the quickest way possible]

How to know if your relationship is in trouble

There are many ways someone can tell if their relationship is in serious need of repair. Everything from dysfunction to codependency are major red flags that need to be dealt with if you want to work things out.

And, although arguing is healthy for a relationship, fighting is not. If the two of you are always yelling at each other or throwing low blows, there’s a problem. When you pick fights over little things and spend all your time together arguing instead of loving each other, it’s a sign your relationship needs fixing. [Read: 15 signs you’re fighting a little too often in your relationship]

When you fight against each other instead of for each other, something needs to be fixed. You aren’t putting your relationship first, but instead, your egos.

If you are unhappy in your relationship, the odds are, it’s broken. When you are unhappy more often than you’re happy, things aren’t good. And if you don’t learn how to fix a broken relationship, things will unravel one way or another. [Read: 7 secret signs that reveal a really bad relationship]

How to fix a broken relationship

Not all relationships are doomed to fail just because they break. The truth is, you could be with your soul mate, and things are just really rough. You need some guidance to fix it before it gets ruined for good. There’s nothing wrong with that.

If you feel like your relationship needs to be fixed, we know just how to help. Here are all the different ways to fix your broken relationship and make it last. If they’re worth it, then you do whatever it takes to make things better. [Read: 16 simple secrets to a perfectly happy relationship]

1. Identify the problem

There may be big issues looming over the both of you and making the relationship difficult. Are there trust issues? Do they do something you hate, and you constantly nag them about it?

If there is an issue at the center of all your issues, identify it and work to fix it.

When there’s only one problem, it’s a lot easier to get through than if there are a lot of them—which very well may be the case. Be sure to work together to figure it out too. You may both have different issues, and they both need to be handled. [Read: 8 problems that will make your relationship stronger]

2. Communicate with them

It’s no secret that communication is the key to a happy relationship. Marriage counselors preached this very idea for such a long time and for a good reason. When you openly talk to your significant other about anything, it’s easier to work through your problems and learn how to fix a broken relationship.

If you close yourself off and expect them to know what you’re thinking, you’re asking for failure. You need to talk about even small issues so you can work them out before they become bigger ones that lead to resentment. [Read: 14 steps to better communicate in a relationship]

3. Voice your concerns

Tell them what is bothering you. Don’t silence yourself and force them to figure it out because that will surely break your relationship if it’s not already broken.

In case you didn’t know, humans can’t read minds. So they’re not going to know when they’ve done something that upsets you and vice versa.

Start opening up and telling them what’s wrong so they can help make it right. You don’t need to nag or complain. Just calmly let them know how you feel. They should care and want to make you happy. [Read: 20 things happy couples never ever do in a healthy relationship]

4. Pay attention to your partner’s feelings

Just because you’re upset doesn’t mean you’re the only person in the relationship suffering. If the relationship is truly broken, then your partner feels just as frazzled as you. Pay attention to how they feel.

Ask them. How do they think things are going? Be empathetic if you want to fix a broken relationship, and you’ll find your relationship starts mending itself. [Read: 7 reasons why empathy is important in a relationship]

5. Do something fun together

When was the last time the two of you got out and did something fun together, like laser tag? You need to create new experiences with each other in a fun environment to remind you how much fun you have together. It’ll bring you back to when you first got together and help you realize how things could really be.

Not everything needs to be so serious and intense all the time. Maybe you’ve been weighed down with work and stress. Taking some time to enjoy one another in a fun atmosphere can remind you why you want to fix this relationship. [Read: 33 fun date ideas that every couple should try]

6. Spend time away from each other

Just as much as you have to spend quality time together, spend some time apart. Couples who are always together end up getting sick of each other and bicker all the time.

Give yourselves time to miss each other. You aren’t being mysterious or sneaky. Instead, you are focusing on yourself and your friendships outside the relationship. Reigniting your independence can bring a newfound appreciation to your relationship. [Read: How to give space in a relationship without drifting apart]

7. Spice up your sex life

Sex may not be everything in a relationship, but it definitely plays a huge role. If your sex life is amiss, then everything can feel off. Sex and intimacy tie a lot of your connections together.

To fix a broken relationship that lacks pleasurable sex, start by spicing things up in the bedroom. Have an open dialogue about what you both want. Having this connection reopened makes it easier to open yourselves up to your problems, too. [Read: 16 mind-blowing ways to spice up your relationship: Tonight]

8. Admit when you’re wrong

You’re not always right in every situation. You know that, even if you don’t want to admit it. You can’t always blame your partner for everything and think of yourself as a saint. A relationship is a two-way street. You both need to take some responsibility.

So, admit when you’re wrong, apologize, and move on. It stops arguments from overflowing and fixes your broken relationship.

9. Understand where they’re coming from

Put yourself in their shoes. Even if you don’t agree with something they do and want to scream at them for it, try to understand where they’re coming from first. Often this will help you see things from their perspective, and you may have done the same thing.

Really hear them out when they explain. Don’t make up your mind before hearing what they have to say. [Read: How to be a better listener in the relationship]

10. Let them know you want to fix it

Sometimes, couples get so caught up in how broken their relationship is they don’t even think the other wants to fix anything. You may assume they’ve given up, and they may assume the same about you.

Make sure they know how much you want things to work. They may have felt defeated until now. Just telling them you’re committed to working things out will open their eyes and help them make just as much of an effort as you are. [Read: Love is a choice: Why only you can make love happen]

11. Put in all your effort

Don’t half-ass it. Honestly, that only hurts your chances of fixing your broken relationship. Not only that, but your partner will be able to tell if your heart isn’t all the way in it, and this will hurt them.

Plus, why are you trying to fix a relationship if you’re not willing to give it your all?

12. Stand up for yourself

If you’re feeling unhappy in your broken relationship, it may be because you’re letting your partner walk all over you and your desires. Tell them how you feel and stand your ground. Stand up for yourself, and demand their respect.

They may have gotten comfortable with how they’ve been treating you. Making it clear that things aren’t okay will be a great starting point. [Read: When the love is gone: 15 gestures to bring back the love]

13. Don’t be afraid to tell them what they need to fix

Don’t just admit your faults and make them think they’ve done nothing wrong. Tell them what you need them to do for you to be happy. They won’t know what to do to fix things. Let them know what you need from them.

They might not know certain things they do hurt you and the relationship. If they want to be with you and make it work, they’ll fix their mistakes, and your relationship will last.

14. Retrain your automatic responses

By this, we mean that when your partner tells you something you don’t like, you probably respond in a way that undermines and even hurts them. When you are mad, don’t fly off the handle. Take some breaths and pause to really consider how you feel before reacting.

Consider what you’re going to say before you actually say it. [Read: Relationship arguments – 22 dos and don’ts to remember]

15. Try couples therapy

There is no shame in asking for help. In fact, admitting you need a third party to guide you into fixing your broken relationship requires a lot of strength and bravery. Working together with someone who can aim you in the right direction may be exactly what you need.

Don’t be afraid to look outside for help. This could be your saving grace. [Read: 10 signs you need couples counseling to fix your relationship]

16. Be honest with yourself

Of course, you want to be honest with your partner, but remember to be honest with yourself first. Do you want the relationship to work because you don’t want to be alone? Are you afraid to fail?

Do you truly love your partner and want to be with them? Will you be able to fix the broken relationship without changing who either of you fundamentally is?

17. Rebuild the trust

Most broken relationships are cracked by distrust. Cheating, betrayal, or lying is what starts the break, and it just keeps spreading. To fix those cracks, the trust needs to be rebuilt. You can’t forget about what happened. You have to face it and figure out if you can work through it and trust them again. [Read: How to rebuild trust after even the worst betrayal]

18. Maintain respect

Throughout any broken relationship, if the respect is gone, the chance of fixing things is slim. No matter or angry or fed up you may be, disrespect takes things too far. Saying things you can’t take back messes things up deeply.

Maintaining respect and care for each other through all arguments helps you fix things without going backward first. [Read: How to show respect in a relationship and love each other better]

19. Know when enough is enough

It takes two people to fix a broken relationship. Sometimes both people just aren’t willing to put their differences aside to save the relationship.

Be willing to give up if you’re not getting what you deserve. Truthfully, your partner may not be as willing to fix things as you are. If they don’t want to make the relationship work, it’s not fair to put all your effort into something that won’t last.

You deserve to be with someone willing to put just as much effort into fixing a broken relationship as you. Don’t think that being single for a while is worse than being in a bad relationship. It can actually help you see the light and find a solid relationship.

[Read: How to make a relationship last: 19 love commandments]

You can learn how to fix a broken relationship. But Not all relationships are meant to last. However, if you truly feel in your heart that this broken relationship can be fixed, then all the above tips are what you need to bring it back and make it last.