How to End a Casual Relationship the Right Way Without the Drama

Casual relationships can be tricky to end because we treat them as laissez-faire. But there is a right way to know how to end a casual relationship.

Because casual relationships don’t normally have a starting point, it’s weird when it comes time to end them. But there is actually a right way for how to end a casual relationship.

When I was in a casual relationship, it was a little weird. I wasn’t sure how to go about it. So… we’re not in a real relationship, but we kind of are? I ended up getting emotionally attached, obviously, and when the guy ended things, he basically just ghosted me.

What do you do? You were never really together to begin with. A lot of people aren’t sure how to handle it. Do you break up with someone you were never actually in a relationship with? Well, the short answer is yes. [Read: How to have a casual relationship without getting hurt or betrayed]

How to end a casual relationship

When it comes to casual relationships, the beauty is their very casualness. You don’t have to have any talks about the future or go out of your way for your partner. It’s chill.

This is why when people want to end the relationship, they don’t treat it as a big deal. Of course, it’s not a big deal, but your partner deserves to be told that you’re no longer interested in a casual relationship. You don’t need to have a serious talk with tears and tissues, but you should communicate with them about how you’re feeling.

End things the right way. [Read: 15 signs the two of you are slowly starting to get more attached]

#1 Be honest with yourself. Whether you’re in a serious or casual relationship, you should always check in with yourself and see how you’re feeling. Are you enjoying the relationship? Is it something you want to continue or not? How you feel when you’re around someone is very important. Don’t waste your time if you’re not enjoying yourself. [Read: 25 tips to end a relationship without making it messy]

#2 Be honest with your partner. I know the easy thing would be to lie and make up some stupid excuse for why you’re not into seeing anyone right now. But why lie about it? This is a casual relationship; you should feel comfortable ending things if you have to. Don’t use the old, “it’s not you, it’s me,” line. You can do better than that. Tell them the truth *in a nice way*.

#3 Talk to them in person. Come on, I know everyone likes to avoid face-to-face contact and would rather text their partner about ending the relationship, but you’re not twelve anymore. That’s not a good look for you. Meet up with them, grab a coffee, and have a genuine conversation. If this is someone you respect, it’s the least you can do.

#4 Don’t ghost them. I know, this is the easiest way to “hint” to them you’re no longer interested, but it’s also very immature and disrespectful. Being ghosted is the worst because you have no closure. I would rather be told someone isn’t interested in seeing me anymore than thinking they disappeared, only to run into them six months later at a Starbucks. [Read: What is ghosting really and how does it work?]

#5 No more sexy time. I know the intimacy was great, but if you want to know how to end a casual relationship the right way, you cannot have sex with this person anymore. You need to make a decision. If you want to continue sleeping with them, then don’t end the relationship or talk to them about redefining the relationship. But if you’re certain things need to end, stop sleeping with them. Seriously. Don’t play games with people’s feelings.

#6 It’s okay to feel bad about this. Before even talking to them about things, you may feel anxious, even guilty about ending things. That’s completely understandable and perfectly normal. If anything, it shows that you care. Don’t try to push these feelings to the side. Embrace and process them. It’s a breakup after all, and you’re human. [Read: The signs your ex is confused about your breakup]

#7 No mixed signals on social media. After you break the news to them, lay off social media. You can post photos and statuses, but don’t like or comment on their posts. This really gives off mixed signals, and that’s the last thing you want to do. Take a break from liking their things on social media.

#8 Don’t ask to be friends. We all know that cannot happen, at least right now. You need to give them space and time to heal and move on. If you offer friendship, this will only delay the healing process and make things unclear. Be crystal clear with what you want and how you feel. Don’t muddy the water with friendship. [Read: 12 reasons why the no contact rule is the best way forward]

#9 You may receive a negative response. Not everyone likes being dumped, and not everyone is going to handle the news well. They may become angry or upset, and you must prepare yourself for that. If you receive negative feedback, don’t respond in anger. Instead, be supportive and kind. They’re hurt, and they’re entitled to have their feelings.

#10 Do it as soon as possible. There’s no good time to tell someone you don’t want to continue seeing them, honestly. So, do it as soon as possible. If not, you may start to resent them, and that’s not a good feeling for either of you. Plus, it’s not fun to be strung along by someone who’s not into you anymore.

#11 When you feel horny, don’t contact them. With a casual relationship comes its own set of perks. But once you end the relationship, the perks are gone. If there’s one night you’re feeling horny, do not contact them.

First of all, it’s extremely selfish. Second of all, you’re not giving a clear signal. If you don’t want to be with them, then end things. Don’t call them when you’re feeling horny. [Read: These 14 casual dating rules make or break your casual relationship]

#12 Talk to them about the relationship. You don’t know what they’re thinking. Maybe they’re looking to change the relationship, making it even less committal. Unless you talk to them about it, you’ll never know what they want. If you’re interested in only sex, let them know. See what they say. Maybe they want the same, or maybe not.

[Read: How to know for sure if you can handle casual relationships]

Casual relationships have their pros and cons. But when it comes time to know how to end a casual relationship, do it the right way. End things on good terms.