How to Avoid Being Cheated On… Again: 25 Ways to Protect Your Heart

Being cheated on feels so awful that you might end up swearing off relationships forever. Here’s how to avoid being cheated on again.

Relationships can make you feel like you’re on cloud 9, providing joy and fulfillment. However, there are also relationships that involve cheating, which can make you feel as if your heart got tossed into a big, black abyss. If you’ve experienced this, you surely would want to learn how to avoid being cheated on in the future. Understanding and implementing strategies to prevent such painful experiences is crucial, unless, of course, you’re some sort of glutton for punishment.

We all want a good relationship. The more bad ones you experience, the harder it gets to believe in the good ones. But they do exist. Sure, you might endure heartbreak, or get cheated on, but that doesn’t mean you’re not going to find someone who can piece your heart back together because you most definitely can.

Sometimes, we just need a little help and a different opinion when it comes to relationships. Why do you think so many people read relationship advice articles? If you are currently avoiding the dating scene because you’re afraid of being cheated on again, I’m here to help you become a believer in love once more. [Read: Toxic relationship: What it is, 107 signs, causes & types of love that hurt you]

The Trauma of Being Cheated On

A hot topic often pops up in relationships: how to avoid being cheated on. It’s not about being overly cautious or distrusting, it’s more like doing your homework to avoid a nasty surprise. Let’s face it, being cheated on is a pretty rough ride for anyone.

First off, the emotional side of this coin isn’t pretty. When someone steps out on you, it’s like an emotional whirlwind. Trust, that big deal in any relationship, gets knocked off its pedestal.

This is not just something that makes you feel sad for a while, you’ll have to deal with the big, messy aftermath. You might find yourself in a funk, wrestling with trust issues, even when you jump into something new. [Read: How to trust again & give someone your heart when you’re scared]

Then there’s the hit to your self-esteem. It’s like suddenly questioning if you were ever enough – and spoiler alert, that kind of thinking can stick around like a bad habit.

Dealing with the fallout from infidelity is like signing up for a self-discovery course. It’s about understanding what freaks you out, what makes you tick, and how to build a relationship that’s more fortress and less house of cards.

How to Not Get Cheated on Ever Again

No one sets out on a new relationship for the purpose of getting hurt. But so many of us have no idea how to protect ourselves from partners who end up being unfaithful. Here’s how you can protect yourself to avoid being the victim of yet another cheating schmuck.

1. Trust Your Gut

Although it may seem silly, most people usually know the truth, even if they don’t want to accept it. If you have ever been cheated on, you know exactly what I’m talking about. But sometimes, people choose to look the other way, ignoring all the signs right in front of them.

One way to avoid the heartbreak that comes with cheating is to trust your gut and those feelings you can’t shake off.

If you keep thinking the worst when it comes to your partner, and the feelings aren’t going away, your instincts might be on to something. Trust yourself above all else. [Read: Gut instinct: What it is, how it works & 30 tips to follow & listen to your gut]

2. Don’t Be So Quick to Date

The thrill of falling fast and hard for someone new is as exciting as dating gets. It’s a warm, fuzzy feeling when you find yourself thinking you’re in love with the one that’s perfect for you.

But the reality is that you can’t truly know someone in a week, in a month, not even necessarily in a year. Sometimes, you find out you never really knew them in the first place.

If you have been cheated on by someone that you fell hard and fast for, one way to not make the same mistake again is by taking things a little slower.

For starters, don’t rush into a relationship immediately just because you start having those same warm and fuzzy feelings. What’s the hurry? Fools really do rush in!

By slowing down the love train a little, you allow yourself time to get to know someone better. You might find out you like them even more as you continue to get to know them, or maybe you find out things that you really don’t like. And if that’s the case, you’ve saved yourself from another failed relationship.

3. Quit the Games

Playing games is the opposite of honesty, and if it’s honesty that you want from your partner, you should learn to give as much as you want to take.

When you don’t play games, you show maturity, and therefore, you are taken more seriously. The whole “player” shtick will only work if you’re just in it for fun and games, but if you want a relationship, it’s time to drop the games. [Read: Mind games in a relationship: Why play, when it’s okay & how to stop it]

4. Communicate

If you don’t communicate how you feel, what you want, or what you expect, then how do you expect anyone to understand you and fix whatever it is they have done to upset you in the first place?

No matter how many times you read your horoscope or visit a physic, you’re probably not going to end up with a person who can literally read your mind.

The more you talk to your partner about how you feel, the more likely they’ll be able to understand you and empathize with you. They’ll know what you want and what you can offer, and this allows them to act according to what they think is best for your relationship.

And if your partner understands the relationship better thanks to better communication lines, they’re less likely to intentionally hurt you by cheating. [Read: Effective communication in a relationship]

5. Trust Your Partner

Just because you’ve been cheated on before, doesn’t mean that every potential partner in the entire world is a cheater and out to hurt you.

Would you like it if every person you dated assumed you were a gold digger, just because you share some traits with a gold digger they dated before? No, you wouldn’t like that.

Unless someone gives you a reason not to trust them, trust them! It’s really that simple. You can’t control people and what they do, but, despite this extremely cynical world we live in, you can always hope that giving someone your trust makes them realize that it’s for keeps, and that they shouldn’t do anything to shatter it. [Read: Trust Issues in a Relationship: 22 whys & ways to get over it together]

6. Stop Assuming the Worst

The saying is true, “never assume anything because you end up making an ass out of ‘u’ and ‘me.’” Pessimism is exhausting, honestly. If we all went around on a daily basis worrying about what could go wrong instead of enjoying all the great things that actually do happen, what would be the point of waking up every day?

Negativity like this may make you think that you’re just bracing yourself for the worst possible scenario, but in reality, you’re just setting yourself up for failure.

Who would want to date someone who always thinks of how things can go horribly wrong? Once your partner feels the gloom of your pessimism seeping into the relationship, then it won’t be a huge surprise if they try to find someone who focuses more on the bright side.

7. Keep the Spark Alive

Monotony is one of the many things to blame for a person’s infidelity. That’s why it’s crucial for couples to always find time for each other, no matter how busy they may be. Take a long, hard look at your relationship, and try to find which aspects of it could use a little pick-me-up.

Have you been spending less time together? Set up a weekly date night routine to catch up. Is the sex getting boring? Amp up with kink by trying to indulge in each other’s fantasies.

Running out of things to talk about? Try out new activities together. There are literally thousands of ways you can keep the spark alive in a relationship! [Read: 10 steps to reignite the lost spark in a relationship]

8. Be Independent

Just because you fell in love with someone, and want to be with them all the time, does not mean you should forget about yourself and the things you enjoy doing. It’s healthy to spend time apart, and you two don’t always have to be into the same things.

No one likes a needy girlfriend or boyfriend. You need to give each other room to breathe and grow outside of the relationship.

Keeping your partner in your sights 24/7 will only serve to make them feel smothered, and they’ll be struggling to find a way out… And that usually ends up being in the arms of another. [Read: Important habits you need to be more independent]

9. Invest in Mutual Respect

A key strategy in learning how to avoid being cheated on is fostering mutual respect in your relationship. Respect acts like a glue that holds various aspects of a relationship together. When both partners genuinely respect each other’s thoughts, feelings, and boundaries, it creates a strong foundation.

This respect means honoring each other’s needs and differences, and not just in words but in actions too. When respect is deeply rooted, it discourages behaviors that could harm the relationship, including infidelity.

10. Understand Your Partner’s Love Language

Everyone expresses and receives love differently, and understanding these love languages can be crucial in avoiding infidelity. If you’re well-versed in what makes your partner feel loved and appreciated, you’re more likely to fulfill their emotional needs. [Read: 33 emotional needs in a relationship, signs it’s unmet & how to meet them]

It might mean spending quality time together, giving compliments, doing acts of service, physical touch, or giving gifts. When both partners feel understood and cherished in the ways that resonate with them, it lessens the chances of looking elsewhere for fulfillment.

11. Prioritize Transparency

Another way to avoid being cheated on is seeing transparency as a golden rule. It’s about more than just being honest, it’s about being open with your feelings, experiences, and concerns.

A level of openness like this can sometimes feel vulnerable but it creates a strong bond of trust. It also means being clear about expectations and discomforts in the relationship.

When transparency is a norm, it reduces misunderstandings and builds a healthier, more secure relationship.

12. Cultivate Shared Goals and Dreams

Working together towards common goals or dreams can significantly strengthen a relationship. It’s not just about individual aspirations, it’s about what you want to achieve as a couple.

This could range from financial goals, travel plans, or personal growth objectives. When you’re both invested in a shared future, it creates a sense of teamwork and partnership. This unity makes it less likely for either partner to seek fulfillment or excitement outside the relationship.

13. Encourage Healthy Social Circles

Your relationship can be significantly influenced by the social connections you and your partner maintain. Actively supporting each other in cultivating friendships and social networks that are nurturing and positive adds richness to your personal lives.

Maintaining these connections outside the romantic relationship fosters a supportive community, which can mitigate feelings of isolation. Friends who understand and respect your relationship contribute positively to its strength and endurance. [Read: 33 easy ways to meet new people & widen your social circle effortlessly]

14. Regular Relationship Check-ins

Making time for consistent check-ins with your partner is a proactive way to safeguard your relationship. During these moments, openly discussing each other’s feelings about the relationship is key. This is your chance to bring up any issues, share appreciation, and renew your commitment to each other.

Keeping these lines of communication open prevents minor issues from escalating. Engaging in these regular evaluations and attentiveness to the relationship’s needs ensures its ongoing health and strength.

15. Personal Development and Self-Understanding

Lastly, understanding yourself is a crucial aspect of avoiding being cheated on. Personal development leads to better self-esteem and a clearer understanding of what you want in a relationship.

When you know your worth and what you bring to the table, you’re less likely to tolerate behaviors that don’t align with your values, including infidelity.

Additionally, personal growth ensures that you are also evolving as an individual within the relationship, keeping it dynamic and fulfilling. [Read: 28 self-improvement secrets to improve yourself & transform into your best self]

Common Pitfalls to Avoid

Also, be mindful of the common pitfalls in relationships. Falling into these traps can increase the risk of facing infidelity, so being aware is a key step in understanding how to avoid being cheated on.

1. Ignoring Early Warning Signs

Often in relationships, red flags present themselves early on. It’s easy to overlook these signs, especially when you’re wrapped up in the excitement of a new connection.

However, paying attention to behaviors that feel off – like a lack of transparency, avoiding deep conversations, or consistent unreliability – is crucial. Addressing these issues early can prevent bigger problems down the line, including the possibility of infidelity.

2. Neglecting Your Own Needs and Boundaries

Remember, in a relationship, your needs and boundaries matter big time. Continually setting them aside for your partner can brew personal dissatisfaction and signal that your needs play second fiddle.

Such an imbalance often breeds resentment, creating an environment where infidelity might find a foothold.

But hey, when you stick to your guns about what you need and respect your own boundaries, you’re setting the stage for a healthier, more balanced partnership. [Read: 23 secrets to set personal boundaries & guide others to respect them]

3. Overdependence on Your Partner for Happiness

Chasing happiness is normal in relationships, but leaning too heavily on your partner for your emotional fix? That can backfire. This kind of pressure can weigh heavily on the relationship, possibly leaving your partner feeling caged or overwhelmed.

As we said earlier, finding joy in your own life, separate from your partner, is crucial. It’s all about striking a balance – you’re with them, not glued to them, and that’s what keeps things solid.

4. Failing to Appreciate Your Partner

It’s easy to get caught up in the day-to-day and forget to show a little love to your partner. When they don’t feel valued, it can push them away.

Make a habit of letting them know you see and appreciate their efforts. A simple ‘thank you’ or acknowledgment can do wonders for keeping your bond strong and their eyes from wandering. [Read: 44 warm ways to say “I appreciate you” & show appreciation without words]

5. Avoiding Difficult Conversations

Dodging the tough talks? We’ve all been there. But here’s the thing: when you avoid hashing out the tricky stuff, those problems don’t just vanish. They simmer and can drive a wedge between you two.

Embrace those hard conversations, whether they’re about money matters, bedroom topics, or future plans. It’s like relationship armor against the tough stuff, infidelity included.

6. Letting the Relationship Become Stagnant

A relationship running on autopilot can lead to wandering eyes. Keep things fresh and exciting. Mix it up with new activities, dream up goals together, and keep that romantic spark alive. A relationship that’s always evolving and growing? That’s a relationship that’s cheat-proofing itself. [Read: Stagnant relationship: 36 standstill signs, why & how to make it progress]

7. Ignoring Your Partner’s Emotional Needs

Neglecting the emotional side of things can be just as harmful as physical betrayal. If you’re not tuning into your partner’s emotional channel, they might start tuning into someone else’s.

Key move? Listen to them, really listen. Show up for them emotionally. It’s the kind of stuff that keeps a relationship tight and true.

8. Lack of Trust

Here’s an irony for you: not trusting your partner can sometimes lead to the situation you’re afraid of. Constant suspicion or snooping can chip away at the relationship’s foundation.

Trust is the name of the game. Give them their space, respect their privacy, and if you’ve got fears, talk about them. Building trust is like building a fortress around your relationship. [Read: Trust issues in a relationship: 22 whys & ways to get over it together]

9. Refusing to Evolve with Your Partner

As people grow, their needs and perspectives change. A refusal to evolve with your partner can create a rift as you both drift towards different paths. Embrace change, support each other’s growth, and find new ways to connect to keep the relationship strong and cheating at bay.

If you met your partner as a thrill-seeking adventurer and you’ve since grown into a homebody, you can’t expect them to remain the same forever. A refusal to grow and change together can lead to a divide, with each of you wandering down separate paths. It’s important to embrace change, actively support each other’s personal growth, and continuously find new ways to connect. [Read: Growing together if you started your relationship young]

10. Neglecting Physical Intimacy

While not the cornerstone of every relationship, physical intimacy is vital for many. Neglecting this aspect can leave your partner feeling disconnected or undesired.

Ensuring that both partners’ physical needs are met, and keeping the physical connection alive, plays a significant role in maintaining a faithful and satisfying relationship.

Follow These Tips to Lessen the Chances of Being Cheated On

There’s no 100% guarantee that these tips will prevent your partner from cheating. After all, if it’s in their nature to cheat, they’ll do it no matter what. But what these tips can do is help you lessen the possibility of getting your heart broken by a cheating partner again. That’ll definitely up the odds a bit, and in a science as unstable as relationships, that’s as good as it gets.

So, by diving into these tips, you’re really getting ahead of the game in figuring out how to avoid being cheated on. Think of it as giving yourself a crash course in creating a kind of relationship where staying true to each other is just part of the deal. You’re not just playing it safe, you’re actively setting up for a partnership where everyone’s all-in on being loyal.