How to Attract an Alpha Male into Your Life and Keep Him Hooked

An alpha male is self-assured, attractive, and charming—you want him! Here are 10 steps on how to attract an alpha male and keep him in your life.

I used to balk at the idea of the alpha male. What was this type of man about? Did he go around beating his chest and speaking like Tarzan? Did he make your knees go weak with a simple raise of an eyebrow? What exactly was the attraction? Why would I want to know how to attract an alpha male?

My feelings changed pretty quickly once I had my first encounter with the alpha species. One look and I turned to mush. A few minutes in his presence and I couldn’t form a coherent sentence.

I know, pathetic. This is the effect my particular alpha male of the time had on me.

I’m not going to pretend this effect lasted for long, because as alpha as he was, he was still flesh and blood, with just as many flaws as anyone else. The problem is, it takes you a long time to realize those flaws, because you’re too dazzled by the alpha-ness!

Despite my experience, an alpha male can be a man who simply makes you feel safe, loved, adored, and special. If you have someone bordering on the fringes of your life who fits this description, I’m going to talk about the steps on how to attract an alpha male into your life, and hopefully keep him there for the foreseeable future. [Read: The 10 tips you need to remember if you’re dating an alpha male]

How to attract an alpha male? 10 foolproof steps

First things first, before you make all kinds of efforts to attract this man into your life, ask yourself what you find attractive about him. Is it all bravado? Is there something a little more lurking below the surface? Only you can tell!

Before we begin, a disclaimer. These 10 steps might grate on you a little, they might make you feel like you must flatter someone for the sake of it, and hold back for no apparent reason. It’s true, I felt that way also, but an alpha male is not going to take kindly to random acts of affectionate spontaneity. Stick to the plan for the best results!

#1 Let him be in control. An alpha male is not going to appreciate you asking him out. He needs to be the one to make that move and do the asking. It might sound all 1950s, but this is what needs to happen if you want to know how to attract an alpha male in the easiest possible way.

You need to understand that a man such as this has an ego, for good or bad. He will feel as though he has failed his manliness *or something akin to that* if you do the asking. Wrong? Yes, but that’s the world we’re dealing with here! [Read: 13 charming ways to be more approachable to guys]

#2 Flatter his ego. The ‘E’ word again. Ego! Yes, shower this man with compliments and make him feel good. If you can do that, you increase his confidence and make him feel on top of the world. He’s more likely to do the asking out in this case.

A strong man such as an alpha male needs to feel needed and wanted, and flattering that side of his character will build him up, rather than knock him down.

#3 Show your own confidence. An alpha male will be attracted to an alpha partner; call it evolution or some strange law of attraction. If you want to know how to attract an alpha male into your life, show the same level of confidence in return.

If you need to fake it at first, go for it, because that faked confidence will soon build into genuine confidence. Something you can continue to use throughout your life, not only in attempting to attract this rather alpha of males! [Read: 15 ways to unleash your inner alpha female]

#4 Wear clothes that make you feel great. Again, this is about confidence and feeling good on the inside. Don’t attempt to attract an alpha male by not being yourself, because you’re setting yourself up for a long road of forcing yourself into someone else’s character! Instead, wear clothes you feel great in, which will then allow you to be your true self, brimming with confidence.

#5 Speak about things you’re passionate about. If you can find a piece of common ground to talk about, something that you’re genuinely passionate about yourself, you’ll attract this alpha quicker than you click your fingers.

Do a little social media snooping if you need to, but come up with a piece of common interest that you both share. Then, weave it into the conversation. He will be thrilled that he’s met a confident and like-minded person, and if you can throw some compliments his way, you’ll find the process goes your way!

#6 Don’t be overconfident or cocky. There is a difference between acting confident and being too confident. Don’t let your confidence go over the line towards cockiness. It’s not attractive, and it’s not you!

Always be genuine, but humble at the same time. Confidence isn’t about being in someone’s face. It’s a quiet self-assured vibe infectious to those around you. If you want to know how attract an alpha male, confidence is key and cockiness is out. [Read: 10 awful dating habits that are keeping you single]

#7 Don’t make fun of him. Even if you’re joking, never make fun of your alpha male. He is a strong character, but his ego is easily wounded. Wait until you’ve established your union a little before teasing him with jokes. It’s likely he won’t understand that you’re joking and he’ll take it far too seriously! In this case you’re not going to attract him, but push him away.

#8 Make him feel needed. An alpha male needs to have his ego stroked. He always loves to feel needed. Even if you don’t need help, pretend that you do. Underhanded, yes, I know, but it works! It can be anything. It might be help with changing your car tire or that you can’t open your bottle of soda, whatever works!

Opening up a conversation with “oh, I really need your help” is a winner in terms of how to attract an alpha male. [Read: Why alpha males find a damsel in distress so irresistible!]

#9 Focus on yourself. Have your own interest and hobbies, and talk about them with passion in your eyes. This makes you strong and passionate, two things instantly attractive to an alpha male!

Don’t share everything about yourself, and allow a little mystery to build up. This will pique his attention. When used with the other methods, you’ll find the alpha showing signs of attraction. [Read: How to be mysterious without being too distant]

#10 Let him be independent. If you’re building up to a first date, or you’ve passed that date and you’re hoping for a second, make sure that you’re not erring into needy territory. An alpha male needs to be independent. He won’t stick around if he feels suffocated or tied down.

Keeping your own interests is the key way to do this. When you’re not together, don’t constantly message or call. Let him do his thing and he will wonder what you’re up to, and come back to you!

[Read: How to tease a guy and make him realize just how much he likes you]

Understanding how to attract an alpha male might look like a dating handbook from the ‘50s, but it’s simply the way that this type of man is designed.