Drunk Texts: Why We Do It & 18 Tricks to Avoid Drunk Texting Someone

You wake up with a pounding headache, check your phone, and – oh no! You were drunk texting again! Here’s everything to know so that you don’t do this again.

What on earth did we do before smartphones and drunk texting? Arguably, we experienced good relationships, didn’t make an ass out of ourselves, and didn’t make colossal mountains out of molehills.

Back in the day, we stopped each other from calling people when drunk or getting behind the wheel of a car. Now, all we need to do is pick up our phones while no one watches and drunk text.

The best cure for a drunk text remains prevention. If you know you are headed out for the night to drink, it is always best to avert disaster by taking steps to stop yourself from doing something that could come back to bite you in the ass.

The psychology behind drunk texting

Why do people drunk text to begin with? And why are drunk texts so obviously different from sober texts?

Well, surprise surprise, it’s all to do with the alcohol. When we drink alcohol, or more specifically when we get absolutely sloshed, it changes the way we think.

Primarily, drinking alcohol affects the parts of the brain that control behavior regulation *no one who drinks is shocked by that*. That means that when you’re sober you might weigh the pros and cons before making a decision, drunk you might just throw balls to the wall and go for it!

When sober, you would never think to text your ex or your boss, drunk you might be less hesitant.

It can be the cause for a lot of regret in the morning, especially if drunk texting was involved in your nightly shenanigans. [Read: Hangxiety – what it is, 21 signs, reasons & ways to deal with post-party anxiety]

Why do you drunk text?

Now that we know the psychology of drunk texting, let’s cover some reasons why it happens. Because there are multiple reasons why we reach for our phones when we open a bottle, and they vary widely.

But what are some common reasons for drunk texting?

1. Entertainment

Drinking is fun. Do you know what else is fun? Drunk texting someone who isn’t drunk.

The morning after a night out, you might read back on the text history and think that it’s boring or even a bit awkward, but the night before it had you and your group in stitches. [Read: 29 wild & sexy drinking games for couples or friends at a house party]

2. Booty call

We probably didn’t need to tell you this, but drinking and hookup culture go hand-in-hand. So, if you text someone during a night out or receive a drunk text, the intention behind it might have been for some under-the-sheets fun. [Read: True sex talk – alcohol’s effects on sex and your libido]

3. Lowered inhibitions = confidence

We’ve covered how alcohol lowers your inhibitions, but we haven’t covered the consequences of this. Maybe you’re prone to drunk texting because, with that lowered inhibition, you feel more confident and less accountable for your actions.

You say things you may feel too scared to say when you’re sober because how could anything go wrong when the liquor is pouring and you’re having fun?

4. Lowered inhibitions = recklessness

Ah, the less charming side-effect of having lowered inhibitions.

Having extra confidence isn’t so bad, but making dumb mistakes because you didn’t think your actions through causes more regret in the morning.

You know that the breakup with your ex is good, that you two should part ways and move on, but then you send a drunk “I miss you text” and all those months you spent trying to get over them go down the drain for a brief and complicated situationship.

Do drunk texts hold any meaning?

“Drunk words are sober thoughts.” You’ve no doubt heard that phrase at some point and worried if it was true.

But it all depends on the reason behind the drunk text, to begin with.

For instance, as we covered, if you drunk text someone to entertain yourself or to set up a booty call, you probably didn’t mean every word you said.

A lot of the words probably weren’t intelligible, to begin with, and what could have made sense was just said to get your group to laugh or to get someone in your bed. Hardly credible. [Read: Sober reasons why drunk sex is never a good idea]

But if you know deep down that you sent an embarrassing text to someone because you felt confident to finally confess the emotions you’ve been keeping in, then it’s likely that, in this case, your drunk text mirrored your sober thoughts.

If you’re trying to discern if you received a drunk text that contained some level of truth or if it was just full of nothing, spend a minute trying to figure out why they sent that text. Have they displayed other behaviors that line up with what they said? If it came out of the blue, they likely didn’t mean it.

Tricks to stop yourself from drunk texting

Sometimes worse than waking up to do the walk of shame, picking up your phone in the morning to examine the fallout can be about as pretty as the way you acted the night before when the bar lights came on. These nine tricks help prevent the drama of drunk texting.

1. Find your Jiminy Cricket

Who is Jiminy Cricket? Ask Pinocchio.

You need a friend with your best interest at heart. They won’t tell you what you want to hear. They definitely tell you what you need to hear. If you know shit may go down if you start to partake in the drink, make sure you assign someone to be your watch guard.

They don’t need to wear the badge of sobriety for the evening. They just need to know their job is to protect you from yourself. We all have that friend in our life to trust, turn to them to put an end to drunk texting! [Read: 20 crucial girl code rules for a less drama-filled life]

2. Block callers

Imagine you go out, only planning to have a good time. Just as you get into your groove, someone decides to blow up your phone with some shit message meant to hurt and belittle you. Likely, they realize you’re out enjoying yourself and finding your freedom.

If they feel threatened by the fact that you can find a life of your own, their first instinct is going to be to distract your from your good time by texting you first to get a response. The best way to head it off and enjoy your evening alone? Block any calls from them.

At the end of the night, it solves all of your problems. You’re not upset by the fact they didn’t text you because you hold onto the belief they might have. And the best part is they won’t piss you off or put a dent into your good time by dragging you into drama. [Read: Texting etiquette – 26 rules everyone must know]

3. Leave it at home

Okay, okay, we know this sounds crazy. We take our phones with us literally everywhere we go.

But imagine this – you pry your eyes open in the morning to find what? Nothing. Yep, you find your phone is nowhere to be found. You haven’t ruined anything. Or said anything silly to either make you feel stupid by disclosing too much, or by getting pissed and saying things you don’t mean.

No drunk texting and you get to wake up with a clean slate, nothing bad said, nothing gained, nothing lost. Is there any better morning to wake up to?

4. Pre-type responses

We all know how some shots and a late night make us turn to the dark side. But if you know what you want to say and how things should go down to make for a happy ever after, even after a 2 AM drunk fest, pre-write an “it’s okay we’re still cool,” or even an “I’m sorry” text.

That way, you send something in the wee hours of the night without the drama. When there is little thought process going on, you don’t have to think at all. All you have to do is press “send” for a happy morning ahead. [Read: How to make things less awkward after a fight & feel closer again]

5. Block your number on other people’s phone

If you are with the person who poses as the likely candidate for your drunk text, grab their phone on the way out. Then block your own number. Easy enough, no matter what you say to them, you created a roadblock barring the ugly or obnoxious getting through. The best defense against your drunken ugly thoughts.

You prevent mistakenly sending them a drunk text creating drama for weeks afterward. Like a personal assurance of your good behavior, simply block your own nonsense from getting where it doesn’t belong.

6. Change the language on your phone before you head out for the night

Okay, this one may be a stretch. But it just may work. In the midst of doing lemon shots off of someone else’s face and what lies in your heart turns ugly, pick up your phone and change your language setting to something like Greek or Latin.

No matter what you send, it will sound like gobbledygook. If your boyfriend or girlfriend doesn’t work for the CIA, you are probably good. They will just think you butt-dialed. Hopefully, your level of inebriation prevents your understanding that what you type only means something to someone who speaks Chinese.

7. Don’t drink when you are upset, go to see the one you love

Probably the most unrealistic and stupid suggestion but we have to throw it out there. Perhaps if you experience a hard time with your loved one and feel unsure how to communicate with them, you should not go out drinking and drunk text them about your grievances.

Instead, spend your time going to their place to make amends and discuss your feelings. We know this will be difficult, but it’s the adult thing to do. [Read: 36 ways & questions to fix a broken relationship & rebuild it with love]

8. Change up phone numbers and contact info

There are times when you’ll only hear from those people who aren’t good for you or are downright toxic when one of you is drinking.

If you hide those contacts from your drunk self, then you have a harder time finding who needs to text to get into trouble. If you are drunk enough, you most likely give up finding the contact number before you get into trouble, no? You gotta do what you gotta do.

9. Read it out loud first—group consensus is always a good thing

No matter how much you drink, someone is soberer than you. If you want to make sure you don’t send something really stupid and end up jeopardizing your relationship, make sure you spend the time reading it over to someone around you.

If you hear what you plan to send and give someone the opportunity to tell you it is a bad idea, you decrease the likelihood of hitting send.

Make a hush fall over the room and steal the spotlight if you need to, just make sure before you press send, grab group consensus to know you aren’t doing something really harmful no matter what types of blowjob shots you downed for the evening. [Read: Partner in crime: What is it & 31 signs you have this friend in your life]

We have all experienced that drunk moment where we think whatever we need to say is warranted and will be received in the way we mean it. We mistakenly think that drunk texting serves the purpose we hope for, but it rarely does.

What to do if you struggle to control your drinking

It’s a difficult topic, but one we have to bring up. Maybe you’re sending too many drunk texts and it’s ruining your relationships with others. Maybe this isn’t even your first time reading this feature.

If no matter what you do, you can’t control the drunk texting, maybe it’s not the drunk texting that’s the problem.

If you think your drinking has gotten out of control, there are things you can do.

1. Cut down

Take a look at what and how much you drink in a week. Try substituting some of the harder alcohols you usually drink with a softer, less alcoholic drink.

If you find yourself blacking out almost every time you drink, this option will help you to stay in control of your actions.

2. Eat

Drinking alcohol on an empty stomach should be an automatic no-no! If there’s nothing in your stomach to soak up the alcohol, you’ll get way drunker and for way longer.

Eat a meal before or while you’re drinking and you’ll notice such an improvement.

3. Avoid hanging out with bad people

Good friends will never peer-pressure you or force you to go beyond your limits. So, if the “friends” you go drinking with tend to peer-pressure you to drink more than is comfortable, ditch them. They were never good for you to begin with.

[Read: Stand up for yourself – why it’s hard & steps to get what you want & deserve]

4. Indulge in hobbies

If getting black-out drunk is the only way you know how to spend the weekends, maybe try filling your time with healthier, more productive hobbies.

After a grueling workweek, it’s easy to seek relief in a bottle. But if you take up your time with something else, like reading, painting, going for a walk, or exercising, you’ll not only get your drinking habit under control, but you’ll feel so much better physically and mentally.

5. Seek help

Controlling your alcohol intake is no easy feat, especially if you’re worried that your drinking may have turned into an addiction. There’s absolutely no shame in seeking help from a counselor, therapist, or AA group.

In fact, it takes a strong character to admit their faults and get the help of others to better themselves.

Before you send out a drunk text, even with a good feeling and silly intention, make sure what you send is what you mean. You may think it’s really funny or sweet, but there’s a slim chance the receiver may feel the same way!