How to Please a Woman in Bed: 13 Moves to Leave Her Addicted to You

Don’t know what women want? That’s okay, half the time we don’t know either, but pay close attention, because this is how to please a woman in bed.

Wondering how to please a woman in bed? You may hear women complain about their relationships or sex life, but what are you actually doing to change that? It’s a hard question to answer. You may want to, but you’re not sure how to get around doing it. Your reply may be, “Well, how am I supposed to know if she’s not enjoying it? She doesn’t tell me she isn’t. She looks like she’s enjoying herself.”

Okay, I understand that, but to make things easier on yourself, just ask. Now, your partner may be relatively new to you, so you’re to shy to ask. Maybe you don’t want your ego bruised if she gives you suggestions, but don’t take it personally. [Read: 22 common reasons why so many women fake an orgasm in bed]

How to please a woman in bed – 13 details to master the game

Now, while you muster up the courage to ask her if she enjoys the sex, incorporate some of these tips in your sex regime. You’ll be surprised that some of these tips are really simple and easy to do.

I think the problem is many people assume that what pleases their partner in bed involves doing the splits and rearranging organs—that’s not the case. Sex is about connection, not intensely terrifying positions. It’s not as hard as you think.

#1 Teach yourself about sex in general. Listen, the only way to truly figuring out how to please a woman in bed is if you genuinely understand how the female body works. That way, you know where and what the clitoris is and does, you know the sensitivity of the nipples, and the erogenous zones. The more you know about sex, sex health, and communication, the better it is for you. [Read: The truth about how sex feels for a woman]

#2 Not all women are the same. Here’s the thing, while you should educate yourself about sex, sex health, and communication, that provides you with general knowledge. Now, every woman is different, just like every man. Some women have more sensitive nipples than others, the clitoris comes in all sizes, and every girl likes to be touched a different way. I know you may be freaking out but calm down, it’s going to be okay. [Read: 10 awkward conversations you might need to have with your partner]

#3 You have to listen. Listen to her. Though she may not say where or how she likes to be touched, it’s your job to see how she responds nonverbally. You may hear her moan, see her grab her bed sheets, or increase her breathing. These are all signs you’re going in the right direction. This is why it’s important not to compare your current partner to your past partners.

#4 Foreplay is a must. I know guys get excited and want to go right into penetration but you need to slow it down. Men and women are different in this part as it takes longer for women to become aroused than it does for men. This is a huge problem as many men assume that women get turned on exactly like them. If you want to turn her on, focus on the foreplay. [Read: 17 flirtatiously fun foreplay ideas that all women find irresistible]

#5 It takes two. A common complaint in the female community is how their partners have sex with them like a rabbit. It’s quick, fast, and the guy is the only one who cums. If you want to learn how to please a woman in bed, genuinely care about the experience she’s having. Sex isn’t just about you and getting you off, she’s also in the picture as well. Focus on her, trust me, it pays off. [Read: How to seduce a woman with your fingers]

#6 Orgasming is pretty nice. But you don’t want to pressure her to have one. I know you want to make her orgasm because that’s usually the goal for every guy. If she doesn’t orgasm don’t push it, making it feel like she has to. If that happens, she won’t orgasm.

An orgasm is connected to her mental state, so she needs to feel relaxed and aroused. If she’s not achieving an orgasm, maybe it’s time you looked at your techniques.

#7 Use your hands. You have two of them, so you have a great advantage. Now, sex isn’t just about the penis, it’s more than that. Use your hands to explore her body.

Actually, you should be using your whole body to have sex–lips, teeth, tongue–don’t be scared to gently bite her earlobe or lick her neck. At the same time, you can grab and squeeze her ass or breasts. See? The hands come in handy.

#8 Don’t stick to one position. Sometimes, we become so comfortable in a couple of positions, they become routine. Now, this isn’t a bad thing, but sometimes it’s good to spice things up with a new position every now and then. Too much of the same thing leads to boredom, and you don’t want that. So, if you’re always in missionary, it’s time to flip her on her stomach. [Read: 10 kinky sex positions to try out for some wild nights]

#9 Oral sex. Now, oral sex is becoming mainstream which is great as women also deserve to have that performed on them. I mean, come on, we do it for you guys. It can be done during foreplay or sex and arouses her even more. It’s not unusual for women to orgasm during oral sex, you just need to get the technique right. [Read: 16 ways to use your tongue and blow her mind in bed]

#10 Take it easy. If you’re not relaxed, the sex isn’t going to be as good as it could be. You and your partner want to break down those insecurities and negative thoughts and just be in the moment.

If you’re not relaxed, you’re going to miss out on what the sex could have been like. There’s no need to feel pressure and stress, sex is literally supposed to relieve that.

#11 Make sure to communicate. Sex is a tango between two people. If you want the dance to be smooth you need to communicate. Of course, you don’t need full-length conversations, but check-in with your partner and see if it feels good or if they like what you’re doing. This allows her to tell you or move your hand into the right position.

#12 Release each other’s fantasies. Your brain is one of the most active organs during sex. That’s right, it’s not your penis. So, feed your brain and indulge in your fantasies. Whether you act them out or they go on in your head, sex is about freedom, so let your thoughts go wild. [Read: 12 arousing fantasies to try in real life]

#13 Don’t body shame. Women are very sensitive about their bodies, myself included. There’s a lot of pressure on us to look a certain way. Let me tell ya, it’s hard to achieve it. This affects the way we have sex as we may refrain from certain positions because of our breasts, thighs, or stomach.

Though you’re not responsible for her insecurities, help make her feel comfortable. Tell her what you love about her body. When she feels vulnerable, use that moment to compliment her.

[Read: 13 clear signs to know for sure if she enjoys having sex with you]

This whole time you thought you had to memorize each position in the Kamasutra. Well, you don’t! Instead just read up here on how to please a woman in bed and make her want more of you.