Friendly vs Flirty: 22 Signs to Tell If Someone is Flirting With You

Flirty vs friendly, it’s the age-old question! Learning how to tell if someone is flirting with you can be difficult if they’re a natural flirty person. 

Sometimes the line between flirting and friendliness can be blurry. If you want to avoid an awkward misunderstanding, it’s vital that you know the signs someone is flirting with you rather than just being a friendly soul! After all, the whole flirty vs friendly line is a pretty difficult one to interpret!

Every person on this planet of ours is different. Everyone flirts in a slightly different way.

One person might find they automatically blush when you walk into the room. Another person might be completely different and act completely off-hand, while feeling anything but that inside. That’s what can make it quite difficult to work out their intentions.

But, by knowing the differences between flirty and friendly behavior, and with a little careful detective work, you’ll be able to work it out for yourself easily enough. [Read: These are the most common flirting signs to go unnoticed]

Knowing the Difference – Friendly vs flirty

It can be incredibly difficult to tell the difference between friendly vs flirty when someone is just a genuinely nice person. But we’re going to make it easy for you to know how to tell if someone is flirting with you.

1. Is it just with you that they act this way?

If this person only compliments you, or is nice to only you, then consider the fact that they are truly being flirty with you.

If they are nice to everybody, then either they are incredibly flirty with anything and everything, which is possible, or they are just interested in you. [Read: How to know if your friend likes you more than they let on]

2. How do they respond when you flirt?

Try flirting with them. See how they respond to the flirting! If they seem interested in you, then chances are they really ARE interested in you. Don’t doubt it. But if they seem turned off by your flirting or appear uncomfortable, then they are just being friendly… oops.

3. Are they acting on their “friendliness”?

The biggest way to tell the difference between friendly and flirty, is the action taken.

Are they trying to get physically close to you, or perhaps touching your shoulder/hand when chatting with you? Because this is a huge sign of flirtation. If they aren’t coming close to you, they might just be friendly. [Read: Romantic hug vs friendly hug – How to feel the difference instantly]

4. Eye contact is key

We don’t know about you, but when we’re TRYING to flirt with someone, we make sure to make eye contact with them. If they make a point of making eye contact with you when you’re around and even when you’re far away from them, then they’re flirting with you and not just being friendly.

5. They want to know more about you

They aren’t just going to tell you that you’ve got cool tattoos, they ask about the story behind them. In this case, they want to know more about you and your life and not just the surface stuff.

If they ask deep questions and try to spend time with you, they are flirting with you.

6. Non-verbal cues that mean they are flirting

Body language is everything, people! Are they pursing their lips or smirking at you? Perhaps they really go for it and just wink at you from across the room.

Pay attention to the little things because that is how you are going to tell the difference between flirty and friendly. [Read: How to be more playful and flirty when you meet someone]

7. They make it clear that they’re single

They make a point to mention that they aren’t tied down. Whether they just come right out and say it, or they casually mention it, they want you to know that they are single.

Why? DUH, because they are interested in you. They are flirting and not just being friendly!

8. They make a point to give you all their attention

How much attention do you need? ALL OF IT!

Seriously though, if they are flirting with you, they will make a point of paying very close attention to you. They will make you feel special. Perhaps they take you to a more private location because they really want to focus on what you have to say, without distractions. [Read: How to ask someone if they like you without embarrassing yourself]

9. Teasing

Just like when we were in grade school, if somebody makes fun of you, it means they are into you. At least to some degree—if they are playfully teasing you, then this is a pretty big indicator that they are flirting with you, not just friendly.

How to tell if someone is flirting with you and not just being friendly? They tease up a storm!

Maybe they make jokes about something that happened last weekend, or a story that you told them. Whatever it is, they playfully tease you if they are flirting with you. [Read: How to start flirting with a friend – 18 ways to tease them without being weird]

10. Are they showing continuous interest?

If they actively seek you out at a party or ask mutual friends about you then chances are they are interested in you, and they are being flirty.

Maybe they saw you at a party and you chatted all night, but you left wondering if they were flirting with you or if they were just being nice. Well, if they ask their friend about you after the party, then they were flirting. Surprise!

11. Asking you to hangout

Obviously, friends hang out, right? But here’s the thing. If they start a conversation with you just to invite you out, then they might really be flirting with you. This is one of the key ways to learn how to tell if someone is flirting with you.

It also depends on the context of the hangout. Is this a huge party, or is this a one-on-one date? If they want to spend time with you in an intimate setting, then, HELLO, they are flirting with you. [Read: Is it a date or are you just hanging out? 22 subtle clues to tell the difference]

12. Flirty vs friendly via text

Emojis are a key indicator in determining the difference between people who are being friendly vs flirty. Are they sending you lots of emojis?

Just in general, this is probably a big indicator of being friendly because it means they are putting MORE into your conversation than just the surface. [Read: How to flirt over text and type your way into someone’s heart]

13. They glance your way often

When they’re not making eye contact, you might find someone glances your way often.

In this case, you’re always catching their eye. They might look away shyly, like they’ve been caught in the act. This is one of the main signs someone is flirting with you and not just being friendly!

14. They fidget when they’re around you

Are they always nervous or fidgety around you? It could be because they’re crushing hard! Look out for them playing with their clothes.

Perhaps tugging on their sleeve or messing with their earrings. This is a sign of general nervousness. We tend to show it when we’re around people we like in a romantic way. [Read: How to flirt by touch without making it obvious at all]

15. They bite or lick their lips

The lips are considered to be quite sexual. So, if someone is drawing attention to them when they’re around you, it’s probably because they’re flirting!

So, look out for licking of the lips, usually accompanied by eye contact or lip biting in a nervous or fidgety way. If this is happening, it’s one of the signs someone is flirting with you. Be sure to check for eye contact or glances too, just to be sure. [Read: Lip biting – What makes it so hot and secrets to make it way sexier]

16. They give you regular compliments

This could go either way. Someone who is flirting will either give you regular compliments or tease you and give occasional compliments. If they’re regularly complimenting you, it means they want you to know how great they think you are.

17. They make excuses to touch you lightly

Gentle nudges, playful punches on the arm, slight stroking of the arm, these are all flirtation signs. If someone is doing this to you, possibly even without realizing it, it’s probably because they have feelings or urges that aren’t simply platonic! [Read: 15 obvious flirting signs between a guy and a girl]

18. Their body language is open

We’ve already mentioned that how to tell if someone is flirting with you is about their non-verbal cues, but is their body language open?

If you’re around someone you don’t like or you’re nervous for another reason, you show closed body language. This means, your body language is defensive.

If someone is mirroring your standing or sitting position, their general stance is open and relaxed, it’s possible that they feel comfortable around you. Along with other points on the list, this is a major sign someone is flirting with you.

19. There is a visible reaction when they see you

Think back to times in the past when you’ve crushed hard on someone and they walked into the room. You probably reacted without even realizing it.

Maybe your breath caught for a second, you blushed, you smiled, or your eyebrows shot up to your hairline. Look for small reactions whenever you walk into a room if you suspect someone is flirting. [Read: 26 signs a friend likes you romantically even if they’re hiding it]

20. They’re usually the first to like your social media posts

These days, flirtation isn’t just in person. In fact, some of it is done via social media.

If there is one particular person who always likes your posts or someone who always likes them before anyone else, it’s possible they’re watching you out of admiration. Their attention is a form of digital flirtation. [Read: 9 signs that scream Instagram flirting and seduction]

21. They play with their hair

Hair playing is a major sign of flirtation, especially when seen alongside smiles, eye contact, and other types of fidgeting.

If someone plays with their hair, perhaps wrapping it around their finger when talking to you, it’s because they’re flirting with you! [Read: 15 subtle clues to know if your crush likes you back]

22. Their general behavior changes when you’re around

You might not have the inside knowledge on this one, but if your friends tell you they know someone well and they act differently around you, it’s a sign.

Maybe they act funnier, smarter, or more confident when you’re around. It’s something we all do automatically when someone we like is in the same room as us.

Friendly vs flirty? Now you know how to tell if someone is flirting with you, what should you do?

If you notice one sign, wait before making up your mind. However, if you notice three or more signs on this list, there is a high possibility that someone is crushing your way. Their behavior is a way of flirtation. [Read: 20 subconscious signs of attraction that show up between two people]

So, what do you do about it? Well, that depends on whether you like them back! If you do, cut them some slack and flirt back!

There is nothing worse than flirting with someone you like, but you’re getting nothing back! If this happens, they might assume that you’re not interested and decide to move on to someone else.

Flirtation is subtle in many ways. But, if you know what to look out for, you’re more well informed. Everyone is different, that’s the truth. We make these moves without even realizing what we’re doing. It’s like these are our subconscious flirting impulses that were written into our DNA! [Read: How to talk to your crush – The secrets to make them fall hard for you]

It’s interesting to think about the things we do when flirting with someone. Maybe you’re not aware of how you might be coming over to the other person or the things you’re doing.

Take a few minutes to really think about it. Do you go all shy, glancing, then quickly looking away? Or, are you bolder and find it easy to hold their eye contact with a quirked eyebrow to let them know they’ve caught you in the act? Maybe you’re flirting and don’t realize it yourself!

[Read: Know the signs of flirting at work and if your coworker likes you]

It’s not always clear to identify the difference between friendly vs flirty, but this list will help you to work out how to tell if someone is flirting with you.