How to Make Your Ex Miss You: 17 Subtle Ways to Make Them Want You

Do you want to make your ex desire you again? Here are all the subtle but very powerful ways on how to make your ex miss you, desire you and want you back!

Breakups always have that “hangover” stage where your mind constantly regurgitates thoughts and memories of your ex and the time you spent together. If you’re not ready to let go, these tips for how to make your ex miss you might have them coming back for more.

After the initial anger and resentment, you’ll reach a point where you’ll need to come to terms with any lingering feelings you hold for your ex. That is, deciding whether to move on with your life or make amends and get back together.

Whichever direction you choose, everything will be a game of chicken between the two of you from that point onward.

Now, we don’t need to know why you want your ex to like you back – is it for revenge, or is it because you genuinely want to get back with them. But there is one thing you need to know – when you break up with someone, think a million times if it’s worth getting back together. [Read: Regret breaking up? 15 signs you should definitely give it another chance]

Sometimes, a relationship ending is the best thing for your life. Unless you really regret the breakup, try to stay away from an ex’s territory! After all, they are called an ex for a reason.

[Read: How to make someone miss you and regret ever leaving your side]

Why would you make your ex miss you?

There are probably two reasons for this – One, you miss them and want them back. Or two, you want revenge! If getting back is what you want, here’s what you need – How to get your ex back and convince them it’s the right thing to do.

On the other hand, if it’s revenge you want, well, making an ex miss you IS the best revenge. Especially if your ex walked away from the relationship or gave you a hard time, the fact that they miss you would give your little heart all the joy it so badly wants right now!

During a breakup, we tend to dwell in our negative feelings for our ex – grief, remorse, loss, devastation, and even regret. Your ex missing you gives you back the power and control you lost in the relationship. If they were the ones that broke your heart or broke up with you, them missing you is the best form of revenge you can have.

They miss you, so a part of them regrets losing you and everything they did that led to a breakup. They miss you, but they can’t have you – and that’s the biggest ego boost of all.

Now, we know petty games or an inflated ego isn’t particularly the best way to move on with your life, but it’s completely okay if you want a side dish of revenge while moving on at the same time. So knowing how to make your ex miss you can do you a lot of good! [Read: How to get over your ex in a healthy way for your future]

How to make your ex miss you: The tips and tricks you need

Because of pride or stubbornness, no one takes the initiative to get back together. It is up to you to make them flinch in your staring contest. Use a little bit of psychological warfare to make them miss you enough to come groveling back into your arms.

1. Adopt a “Don’t Get Mad, Get Even” mindset

Burn this in your mind after the breakup. Some would say that this is an immature move. But let’s be honest, it feels good to be vindictive sometimes. For starters, raging and self-destructing will not get you anywhere. Post-breakups can be emotional to some degree, but they should not be used as an excuse to put yourself at a disadvantage.

So if you’re dwelling on your self-pity and feeling extremely sorry for yourself, it’s time to get up and learn how to make your ex miss you. Remember the one who wins the breakup is the one who comes out of it stronger, so stop wallowing in self-pity and start working towards getting even.

Have a good cry, then sober up. Feel empowered by this mindset, and that’s the first step to making them miss you and regain your power. [Read: 12 devious ways to be a crazy ex and get your revenge]

2. Cease all forms of communication for the moment

The “no communications” phase is significant. Especially if a breakup is still recent with words and explanations left unsaid, this can be difficult because there will always be that urge to check in on your ex through calls or by stalking their social media.

However, you need to be firm and cease all forms of communication: calls, texts, and social media messages. Giving your ex radio silence shows you are okay with the breakup and will not be easily swayed by a premature makeup conversation.

If you want to be successful in making them miss you, cut off all contact. Ever heard of the no-contact rule? Exactly. How will your ex miss you if you keep texting them or if you’re all over their socials? [Read: The no contact rule – A powerful gamble to get your ex to desire you]

3. Avoid showing emotionally-charged posts and statuses on social media

Want to know the secret behind how to make your ex miss you? Remember this; the post-breakup phase makes everybody vulnerable enough to post sad status messages, a breakup song or two, or a sappy quote from a favorite author or movie on social media. Do not give in at any cost.

Remember what we said about feeling empowered? Don’t show your vulnerability and sadness all over your social media *your ex will use it as an ego boost because your sad posts will only confirm just how miserable you are without them*. Doing so makes it appear you are indeed a sorry slob that needs to be taken back.

Keep your social media postings business as usual to show your ex that you’re handling yourself quite well, like a big boy or girl. [Read: Deleting pictures of your ex – The psychology behind it and why we do it]

4. Avoid confiding to “compromised” mutual friends

As things are, your mutual friends would be pretty eager to offer a listening ear to your breakup woes or to give you words of advice. You need to be wary of your ex’s possible “agents” who might have been asked to fish for information or likely to tattle about your current disposition.

They might seem like your friends, but remember they’re also your ex’s friends. So don’t be so naive to reveal every little bit of information about your breakup or how you’re feeling.

Be a bit reserved when it comes to mutual friends. Or better yet, only share your most honest feelings with your most trusted friends. If anyone else asks, just tell them you’re A-okay! This further keeps your ex in the dark and makes them miss you more. [Read: The 10 types of exes most modern daters have to deal with]

5. Show that life goes on even without them

You both have your favorite places and activities that you did together. If you genuinely liked doing those activities or visiting those places, continue to enjoy them. Don’t let the memory of your ex ruin it for you. Remember, everything is not about them.

If you want to know how to make your ex miss you, the most empowering thing is to show you’re living your life without them in the picture. You want to do a great job in making them miss you? Show how happy you are without them.

The “I don’t want to do it because it reminds me of them” excuse is so yesterday. While you’re out and about, share your life on social media for your ex to see and watch them suffer. [Read: 16 signs your ex desperately wants you back in their life]

6. Be happy and let everyone notice

Wondering how to make your ex miss you? Like what every post-breakup advice says, the best revenge is letting your ex know you’re still happy after the breakup. While there would indeed be a depressed stage, don’t wallow in it for long.

Maturity happens when you realize that the breakup depression doesn’t need you to stop going out and enjoying life. If you want to learn how to make your ex miss you, be happy and don’t stop there. Don’t fake your happiness, but be genuine and authentic in living a joyful life.

So, keep going out with friends, enjoying your usual activities, and keep posting it on social media for the world to see. Trust us, and your ex will miss you in no time! [Read: 13 happy things you need for a perfectly happy life]

7. Show the world and your ex the brand new you

Get your hair done, hit the gym and get that revenge body, upgrade your wardrobe, and then flaunt the post-breakup you. Nothing else makes your ex wallow in despair and longing than seeing the better-looking, more radiant you on social media.

This is why the best revenge is self-improvement because when you show your ex just how much you’ve drastically improved, they can’t help but miss you in the process. Maybe it’s being fitter, more successful, or even more outgoing – whatever works for you, do it!

It might sound like cliche changes, but your ex won’t be able to wrap their heads around this new you. It definitely pushes your ex’s button to realize the marvelous-looking creature they see on social media is the same person they broke up with. [Read: How to look rich – 40 easy ways to look like you’re rolling in cash]

8. Don’t get flustered if you randomly bump into your ex

Believe it or not, this happens more often than we imagine. You both have mutual friends and common activities before, so you’ll likely meet them in a bar or a coffee shop you used to visit together. If you’re serious about learning how to make your ex miss you, don’t show you’re affected when you bump into them.

If this happens and you accidentally make eye contact, look at your ex straight in the eye and give a little grin of acknowledgment. This shows you are confident and mature enough to deal with your breakup.

Confidence is the best look after a breakup, after all. It’ll make your ex think, “Why weren’t they that confident when we were together?”

9. If you randomly bump into your ex, act like they’re a friend you haven’t seen in a long time

This is considered the coup de grace in random ex encounters *the death blow!*.

When randomly bumping into your ex, act friendly and enthusiastic about not seeing and hearing from them for a long time. Initiate small talk and ask how your ex has been doing. Treat them like a friend and that it’s been a long time since you’ve talked. Don’t let your emotions well up in your eyes or stand there staring at them longingly.

This will catch them off guard since this is the opposite reaction that they expect from you. If you want to truly understand how to make your ex miss you, always remember to refuse any further invitation for a more intimate catch-up.

This makes your ex think you have moved on and are not affected by the breakup in the slightest, which makes them miss you. Be indifferent and unaffected by their presence. [Read: 14 cool things to keep in mind and do when you bump into your ex]

10. After some time, entertain communication from your ex

Remember, you are to entertain, not initiate communication. After a period of radio silence, start to accept communication but only on a casual level. Talk like normal people without any strings attached from your past. Don’t be warm and affectionate towards them, because they’re still your ex, remember?

You just want to make them miss you, not get back with them, so talk to them with mild interest. Also, take some time before replying to their texts if they do text you.

Quick replies hint that you anticipate your ex’s messages and might give your ex ideas about your motives. [Read: 25 classy ways to make a guy go crazy over you]

11. Interact casually in the presence of friends

When the inevitable happens and one of your mutual friends in your social circle invites both of you to an event, try to interact with your ex like a normal person. Put out the “I don’t care” attitude to give your ex the idea that you’re doing just fine after your breakup.

The best way to make them miss you is to hit them with the realization that you’re genuinely unaffected and not just putting up an act for their sake. If you show them you don’t care, it makes them miss you a lot more!

12. Make yourself look stunning when meeting your ex with your mutual friends

Also, dress to the nines when meeting your ex as if you’re seducing them. Seeing one’s ex looking so good after a breakup will definitely be agonizing enough for them and make them miss you and desire you even more. You know what they say – dress like you’re on the way to see your ex.

When you look stunning and flawless as ever, it makes them regret everything they’ve done*especially if they were the ones to dump you*. And seeing you in such a stunning outfit is enough to make them miss you and possibly more. [Read: How to look sexy, be and feel sexy without ever trying too hard]

13. Expand your horizons

If you’re serious about learning how to make your ex miss you, you can’t achieve that by staying within your comfort zone. We get that it’s challenging to try new things, especially when everything feels like uncharted territory for you.

But expanding your horizons is the only way for growth and betterment, and that’s the key for your ex to miss you. When you start doing things purely for yourself and not them, it shows. Your ex will see how much you’re growing and thriving, and it’s not because of them. [Read: 5 powerful steps to break out of your comfort zone]

14. Don’t be afraid to go on dates

After the breakup, there comes the point when it’s okay to date around, especially when a significant period has passed. Whether you want to make them miss you or not, it’s always helpful to date around as it will help you move past all the hurt and heartbreak you’ve experienced.

Most importantly, it encourages you to have fun and realize that there really are plenty of fish in the sea! When you let yourself go on dates and your ex sees this, they can’t help but miss you in the process *especially when they aren’t dating yet*. [Read: How to get over dating anxiety – Face your fear & get back out there]

15. Never feel sorry for yourself – ever

This is quite possibly the worst mistake you can make when it comes to knowing how to make your ex miss you. You can’t let yourself feel sorry for yourself, no matter how painful the breakup feels. You can feel sad and cry, sure, but get back up and remind yourself that you’re badass.

Remember your resilience and courage, and don’t let yourself be the victim in your own story. Even if they left you and broke up with you, don’t dwell on feeling sorry for yourself. That’s a self-destructive habit post-breakup, and it certainly won’t make them miss you or want you back. [Read: How to stop feeling sorry for yourself & end the pity party]

16. Don’t stay friends with them, even if they want to

Ah yes, we’ve all been guilty of wanting to be friends with our ex since it practically means they’re still in our lives in some form. But this is a trap, and you’re really not helping yourself by staying friends with them. Basically, you’re giving them the benefits of having you around without an actual commitment *hooking up with them is worse!*.

Don’t give them the satisfaction of having access to you even if you’ve broken up. Especially since staying friends with them won’t get them to miss you. Remember what we said about cutting contact and communication with your ex? Do that instead. [Read: Your ex wants to be friends? 15 questions you need to ask yourself]

17. Actively work on your goals

Self-improvement and success are the best ways if you want to know how to make your ex miss you. If you’re succeeding and doing better than you ever were without your ex by your side, that is the biggest punch in their heart.

You’re basically showing them you don’t need and never have needed them to succeed or be happy in life. And that’s how they’ll miss you. They’d wish they were by your side as you succeed in life, but they’re not.

[Read: 26 deep, daily reminders to change your life forever and go forward]

So, how to make your ex miss you?

No matter how a relationship ends, there will still be memories that would make you long for the good old days with your ex by your side. And whether you decide to move on or make amends to get back to how you once were, missing your ex is inevitable.

But what matters is how you deal with it, and move ahead in life. After all, everyone misses their ex at some point in time. But what they do at other times to get back on their feet is what counts.

[Read: How to get over an ex – 17 steps to heal ASAP in the healthiest way possible]

Now that you know how to make your ex miss you and desire you again, first ask yourself if that’s what you really want and need. If it is and you’ve finally won the breakup, you can now move on with your life.