40 Rules & Dating Advice for Women Tired of Bad Dates & Shitty Men

If you’re struggling with the whole dating world, you simply need a little dating advice for women. Then, you can go out there with renewed confidence. 

The dating game can be tricky. Knowing where to start often feels a little overwhelming if you find yourself single but ready to start dating again. That is why we’ve compiled this helpful dating advice for women. 

The dating world is a scary place to be. And this modern age has made dating even more complicated. You could be chatting it up with virtual strangers you met via dating sites one minute, and sleeping with them the next.

Has the digital age made it easier for people to find true love? Quite the contrary, finding love has become a lot more complicated!

[Read: 80 dating questions you need to casually ask someone before you ever get past the talking stage]

The most important dating advice for women you need to remember

It’s true that dating makes us nervous and not act like our usual selves. You want to have a great date with someone you think has potential. How do you ensure that it goes well? It’s a horrible feeling if you’re ghosted after a first date, especially when you thought it went well!

Maybe the guy doesn’t call you, maybe he is late for the date. We mean, there are countless things they do. But there are some dating rules for women you need to remember so you keep your own personal standards high and don’t let them dictate where the date goes.

You can control where and how the date will end. It seems nowadays, thanks to Tinder, dates are now only for a quick lay. Which is fine, but if you look for something more, well, that can be a problem. Maybe you should print this out and stick it in your purse. [Read: 23 signs he’s not interested in a second date after the first one]

1. Think of an unusual place to meet

Going for coffee or meeting for a drink is pretty standard and a safe bet if you want to have a reasonable time. Why not push the boat out and suggest meeting somewhere or doing something a little more fun? A morning rave? A color run? Going horseback riding together?

Dates are about having fun, so find out your common interests and pick an interesting place! If they are up for it, you’ll know you’re onto something good. [Read: 30 fun first date ideas to leave anyone wanting more]

2. Don’t be afraid to be set up by friends

If you cringe at the idea of your friends getting involved with your love life, remember they have a pretty good idea of who you are and what you like.

Blind dates have always been a thing and as intimidating as they seem, they also work! So the next time your friends set you up on a date, don’t be so fast to decline.

This is one of the dating advice for women you’ll regret not following. You never know, the guy your friends set up could turn out to be great!

3. Get on a dating site

In this day and age, most people who find themselves single end up on a dating website. It’s the easiest and most convenient way to find other single people. In fact, some relationships begin *and work out* all because they took a chance on a dating app.

There used to be a bit of a taboo about joining dating websites. Women wondered whether it made them look desperate and whether the guys on the sites would just be desperate weirdos. Now, the online dating game is entirely different.

There’s so much potential in finding a date on a dating app, so feel free to try it! [Read: All the great reasons online dating is worth a shot]

4. Have some conversation starters at the ready

You might want everything to be cool and natural between you, but often nerves get in the way. Don’t feel bad, as it’s normal to feel nervous when you first start talking to someone. After all, you’re just getting to know one another, so prepare for lots of awkward and messy moments.

Make sure you have some conversation starters at the ready so that you keep the conversation flowing throughout your date. After a while, and maybe a drink or two, you’ll probably relax into it more anyway.

Maybe ask them light questions or break the ice by making them laugh, just so they feel more at ease around you. [Read: 25 fun conversation starters for when you’re drawing a blank]

5. Make a good first impression

You don’t want to overdo it, but there is nothing wrong with making a bit of an effort. First impressions are everything when it comes to dating, so be sure to look your best! You don’t have to look fancy or luxurious, but dressing up neatly will suffice.

Obviously, how much you dress up depends on where you are going, but making an effort to look nice and greeting them with a big smile gives a great first impression. Also, don’t make them wait as that creates a bad impression. [Read: How to behave on a first date – 28 tips to impress your date in minutes]

6. Don’t drink too much

If you feel a bit nervous, it can be easy to drink a bit too much to try and calm yourself down. However, getting super drunk on a first date may be a bad idea.

We know you’re nervous, but drinking one glass after another also leaves a terrible impression on your date! Try to balance your nervousness and drinking.

A few sips will do, and you’ll start to feel your nerves calm down a bit. Otherwise, you may end up saying or doing something stupid or wake up not remembering what happened at all! [Read: What to talk about when you’re drunk with your date]

7. Don’t play it too ‘cool’

While many women think they should play it super cool on a date, there is no need to be too distant or mysterious. If you like them, you like them.

Make that obvious, be friendly, talkative, and genuine. There’s no need to play mind games with them just to have a successful date.

If you have to try that hard, maybe they’re not the right person for you. A little bit of mystery is good, but too much will just push them away entirely. [Read: How to play it cool with a guy without being too distant or clingy]

8. Don’t overshare

Remember what we said about leaving a little mystery? Don’t spill every detail on your first date with them. Keep conversation topics pretty light and casual, ask questions to get to know one another, but don’t reveal absolutely everything about yourself, including talking about your exes!

Unless you want to push them away by doing so, don’t reveal everything about yourself right away. Otherwise, there might not be a second date! [Read: 20 ways to perfect your first date conversation]

9. Be yourself

When it comes to great dating advice for women, nothing beats just being yourself. If you aren’t, then they won’t have a genuine impression of you.

Even if it goes to a second date, how long are you going to keep up the pretense for? It might sound so cliche, but it’s a crucial piece of advice.

You can’t keep it up for long when you pretend to be someone you’re not just for the sake of your date. It’ll get exhausting and eventually, your true colors will be revealed. [Read: How to be yourself – 26 steps to unfake your life & love being you]

10. Don’t put out on a first date—unless you are cool with it

If women want to sleep with a guy on a first date and things are heading that way, then that’s totally great. But there are some things to be aware of. Putting out on a first date might make a guy feel like that’s what you do, and you might end up feeling the same about him.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with getting into bed on the first date, but remember what we’ve said about the element of mystery? Leave something for guys to anticipate in the following few dates. But in the end, it’s really up to you and your personal preference.

Never feel pressured into doing it though, and remember, if they don’t call you because you didn’t, they definitely aren’t worth any more of your time anyway. [Read: Sex on the first date – Should you give in to the urge?]

11. Maintain eye contact

Eye contact will always be sexy so if you’re seeking dating advice for women, you should definitely take note of this.

Make sure you maintain good eye contact throughout your date—if you like them, of course. Body language plays a big part in showing whether or not you like someone, so pay attention to yours. [Read: How to maintain prolonged eye contact when flirting]

12. Don’t ask for anyone else’s opinion just yet

Getting other people’s opinions and analyzing every single second of your date can be pretty destructive. If you like them and they like you, then meet up again. Just see how it goes. You may love your friends and they probably give great advice, but you can’t seek validation from them for all your dates.

There will always be some form of bias and at the end of the day, your dating life is between you and the other person you’re dating – nobody else. Ask for their opinion when things are getting serious but until then, hold off.

13. Follow your instincts and move on if you don’t think it is going anywhere

Our gut instincts tend to be really strong, so this is one of the pieces of dating advice for women you shouldn’t ignore. Not every date is going to be perfect.

In fact, there may be many where you know in the first five minutes that they are not the man for you. Maybe you spot the red flags right away, or something just feels off.

In this case, once the date ends, you’ll know that they weren’t the guy for you. It’s better to move on to the next than stay with someone you don’t enjoy dating! [Read: How to listen to your gut and give strength to your inner voice]

14. Wait for him to contact you

Of course, there is no reason why a woman can’t contact a guy first, but you know that if he likes you he’ll get in touch.

So why not just leave it to him and get on with your day? He’ll eventually call you when the time is right and if not, it’s his loss anyway! [Read: Should I call him? The real answers to make up your mind]

15. Remember, there’s more to life than dating!

It can be very easy to get sucked in too deep when it comes to dating and feel like it’s taking over your life. Remember, there is more to life than dating. If you need to take a break from it, that’s cool too! Your dating life is just one portion of your life, so don’t make it everything!

Just because you haven’t found a date, it doesn’t reflect your worth. This is the one piece of dating advice for women you should never forget. [Read: How to stay single until you’re seriously ready to mingle]

16. Don’t be too focused on one guy

We’re not saying you should stop dating seriously and just play around, but the intention of dating is to find the right person for you.

So in order to achieve that, you need to be willing to date around for quite some time. Date different personalities and people, and you’ll see the various possibilities for you. [Read: How to date multiple guys without being shady or called a cheater]

17. Know your deal-breakers

when you’re dating someone, one of the pieces of dating advice for women you should follow is never to forget your standards and deal-breakers. It doesn’t matter how cute or tall he is; no guy is worth disregarding your standards for.

If you really want the best dating life, remember your deal-breakers. So if you meet a guy and all your standards don’t align with him, then walk away immediately. You’ll thank yourself in the long run. [Read: 10 relationship deal breakers to watch out for!]

18. Make sure you’re ready

Before you go ahead and start dating, you need to make sure you’re ready. Have you healed from your past relationship? Are you sure you’re prepared emotionally and mentally? Have you moved on from your ex? These are the questions you need to ask yourself before dating again.

We can’t always admit when we’re ready as most likely, we also tend to use dating as an escape from our issues and baggage. However, your dating life will be such a mess if you’re not yet ready. [Read: 19 clear signs you are ready for a serious relationship]

19. Be the date you’d want to have

If there’s a specific type of person you want to date, then act like them. Do you dislike it when they use their phone? Do you like someone focused and attentive? Maybe you like someone funny and charming?

When applying the dating advice for women in your life, be the date you’ve always wanted to have.

20. Forget your perfect list

Just like you have your deal-breaker list, you must also have your list of perfect qualities in a guy. Look, you’ll never find someone with the ideal list of qualities. It’s not realistic, and it’s putting too much unnecessary pressure on dating. Dating is about having fun, and it’s not a commitment *at least, not yet*.

So ditch your list of what a perfect guy is and just enjoy the ones you do meet. You’ll be surprised how the guy that doesn’t check all your boxes is the one you end up liking. [Read: 20 personality traits that make the ideal perfect guy]

21. Remember you’re not single because no one wants you

If he asks you that question, he’s trying to feed his insecurity. Don’t give him the answer he wants, instead, you tell the truth. Don’t say, “Oh, I don’t know why, I guess guys don’t really like me” or whatever lame excuse you come up with.

You know exactly why you’re single, you haven’t found anyone worth your time and energy. Tell him, and he’ll know he needs to step up.

22. When a date goes badly, don’t give up

After a crappy date, it’s really easy to say, “I’m never going on a date again.” Maybe he texted the whole time or “forgot” his wallet. Well, either way, he’s a jerk.

Of course, this leaves a bad taste in your mouth. How could it not? But this doesn’t mean you should give up and spend your weekends watching reruns of Friends. [Read: 10 types of guys to stop dating if you want real love]

23. Be comfortable with being chased

Especially on the first couple dates, let him come to you. He should invest some energy and time to get you. If he doesn’t have some sort of plan for your date, say no. Screw that!

He can check what movie plays tonight or spend three minutes making a reservation at a restaurant. It’s not hard. If he won’t put in that effort then he’s not that into you. Well, only for something casual.

24. Don’t think about the future

We know you’re on a first date and as a woman, you may be thinking about the future with him already. Which isn’t bad, but don’t jump too far ahead. Take it easy.

Instead, just enjoy the date and see how it goes.

25. Know what type of dating situation you’re looking for

This is one of those dating rules for women most of us overlook. Before you go on a date, you should know exactly what you’re looking for. Are you looking for something serious? Casual? What type of guy do you want?

You don’t need to know the exact guy, but you should know the characteristics of value to you. That way, when you’re on the date, you’re not going to be questioning yourself because you know what you want.

26. Keep it honest

You may end up actually dating this guy, so keep it honest. We mean, why lie anyway? It won’t bring anything special to the date.

If you’re upfront and honest right from the beginning, you already form a solid foundation regardless of how it ends. [Read: Dating for a month? The realistic expectations you need to keep in mind]

27. If you want to call, you can call

If you really had a great date with them and you want to see them again, call them. You don’t have to wait for them to call or text you, nor should you give it three days. If you like them, grab them.

We mentioned earlier that he should do the running but if you don’t want to wait, you don’t have to. Don’t waste time counting the hours until it’s “right” to call them. You’re not in high school, those rules don’t exist in the real world. [Read: Should you call him? The signs to help you make up your mind]

28. Be emotionally available

If you’re not over your ex then don’t go on a date. We know people probably told you the opposite. If you still cry over him, you’re really not ready. Plus, it’s not fair that you potentially use this guy as a rebound.

Be true to yourself and your date. If you’re ready to emotionally invest into someone, by all means, go on dates. [Read: How to be emotionally available and actually find love]

29. Don’t ignore the red flags

First dates are crucial, they’re basically your first intimate encounter with this guy. So, pick up as much information as you can. Yes, look at the positives, but also pay close attention to the negatives.

Maybe his previous relationship didn’t work out because she was “crazy”—red flag, or that “he was working too much”—red flag. Investigate those red flags to get a better picture of this guy. Also, listen to your gut instinct.

30. Avoid a huge list of expectations

If you have a list of expectations that you need in a guy then it isn’t going to work. You must be a little flexible without going against your red lines.

If you have a list saying that he needs to be funny, dark, tall, handsome, well, you’re going to have problems getting everything crossed off. If anything, you only limit yourself from the potential men that could really suit you. [Read: Dating expectations – type A vs type B personalities]

31. Never be afraid to be truly yourself

Well, there’s no other way around it. You can pretend to be someone else, it’s fine, but eventually, you must take off your mask or you’ll one day forget to put it on.

Just save yourself the hassle of trying to be someone you’re not. Trust us, you’ll find someone who appreciates you as you are. [Read: The dating girl code all girls HAVE to know]

Hit the 30 mark? Dating advice for women in their 30’s

With age comes maturity… at least ideally. With that in mind, let’s go past the dating basics you learned in your teens and 20s, and get right to dishing out more mature advice.

The truth is, the dating game tends to change a little when you hit 30 and beyond. It’s easier in some ways and harder in others. But the good news? You know yourself so much better.

1. Take the time to re-assess what you want

Once you have reached the age of 30, you probably know what you want in life. You are now more in control of your emotions. You can now tell the difference between infatuation and love. [Read: How to get to know yourself and reveal your life’s true passions]

Now that you are more in control of yourself, you have a clearer picture of what you want from a relationship and from life. All those failed dates and relationships in your 20s have taught you what you don’t want, so it logically follows that you’re able to narrow down the options for what you do want.

It’s possible that what you wanted a few years ago has changed. Take the time to re-assess things.

2. Toss out any timelines you may have

Who says that you have to settle down in your 20s, or that you have to nail Mr. Right by 30, or that you should have a kid before 40?

When you have to work on a deadline, you will put so much pressure on yourself that you will be tempted to latch yourself onto whoever comes along.

While there is nothing wrong with wanting marriage and a family, never pressure yourself to settle down just because everyone around you is either getting engaged, married, or having a baby. [Read: Rushing into a relationship – Why you need to learn to slow down]

3. Always stay open-minded

Remember when you had a type? This is the age where you have to be open-minded and date someone who isn’t your type at all. Try dating someone who doesn’t share the same views as you do. Plan a date that goes beyond your comfort zone.

Challenge yourself to take your dating game to a whole new level. [Read: 11 reasons to give the nerdy guy a chance]

4. Don’t let the hurt of the past prevent you from having a happier future

The past hurts, that’s the cold, hard truth. As much as we want to wish the past never happened, the mature thing to do would be to learn from it and move on.

Never let your cynical and cold heart prevent you from trusting the next person who comes along. Welcome each date with an open heart and an open mind. Everyone deserves a chance, and don’t let your past hurts hinder you from finding your happiness.

5. Let go of relationships that are going nowhere

When you are dating in your 30s, you are looking for stability in a relationship. This is the time to let go of relationships that are clearly going nowhere.

Are you still holding on to a dead relationship, where the man has absolutely no intention of settling down and has been a notorious cheater?

Now is the time to be realistic. [Read: 18 emotions you should never feel in a happy relationship with a guy]

Don’t stay because you fear the uncertainties of letting go. Don’t insist on staying because you fear that you will end up being alone. Remember, there are far worse things than being alone.

6. Don’t let yourself fall apart

Do not be that emotional wreck who sobs her eyes out while calling random people at 3am, in hopes that someone will listen to her sad story. Remember that you are worth more than your tragedies, and your heart is full of love to give.

Your heart will heal if you allow yourself to be healed.

7. Don’t see everyone as ‘The One’

One of the common mistakes everyone makes in the start of a relationship is that they put too much focus on the idea of the partner and not the relationship itself.

Not all relationships are going to last forever, and chances are, your visions of the white wedding dress will be crushed. [Read: Is he The One? How to know if he’s the one who’s perfect for you]

Don’t expect anything, and you won’t be disappointed. Enjoy the relationship for the happiness it brings now, but when it brings more harm than good, learn to let go.

8. Don’t settle

The pressure of settling down may apply to many. Do not allow yourself to settle for the next man who proposes, or gives a hint of marriage when you aren’t even sure.

Marriage is a serious thing, and getting there should never be a case of a race to the altar. That’s if you even want to get married, of course! [Read: 25 signs you’re settling in an unhappy relationship]

9. Don’t chase the ‘bad boy’

This is the most common mistake many women make, regardless of their age. Now is not the time to keep giving your heart to the arrogant douchebag who will do nothing but destroy your heart.

You had your whole 20s to enjoy the many ups and downs of dating the bad boy, but your 30s should be a time for a more mature relationship.

Take our advice and start enjoying your dating life

There’s no perfect piece of advice, but dating is about finding yourself and having fun the best way you can. If you want to have the best dating life, just be yourself and have fun with the experience.

[Read: 25 ways to keep a guy hooked and happy in love]

The dating world is a pretty crazy one. However, by following these pieces of dating advice for women, you’ll have more fun with each date and possibly even land a great guy!