16 Well-Hidden Signs You’re Not the Only One She’s Sleeping With
If you’re looking for signs you’re not the only one she’s sleeping with, maybe your gut instinct is all you need. Check out these signs she sleeps around.
We all know that some guys have side chicks, but most of us forget that women can also be cheaters. Yes, both sides are guilty. Let’s get this straight, not all women and men cheat, so you can find someone who’s loyal and faithful. However, since you feel doubt, perhaps the person you’re dating isn’t one of them—maybe. But before you start accusing them of sleeping around, perhaps look for some signs you’re not the only one she’s sleeping with.
Remember, it’s important to be sure if you really want to have a conversation about this. Accusing someone of sleeping with other people isn’t the best way to look forward to a future together! But, if you’re sure this is someone you want to be with, then you need to make sure you’re on the same footing.
[Read: What is cheating in a relationship? The truth most people ignore]
Is she sleeping around with other guys?
If you’re casually dating and non-exclusive, it’s totally fine for the girl you’re seeing to be sleeping with someone else. Why don’t you ask her directly? That’s the easiest way to do it, right?
Of course, the issue is, what if she lies?
What if she tells you she’s not sleeping with anyone else, but you still feel like she may be hooking up with another guy? Sometimes, guys and girls think it’s just easier to lie and pretend they’re not sleeping with anyone else. This is usually because a. they don’t want to break your heart or b. they don’t want you to dump them.
It’s that simple, really. Since the relationship isn’t really serious and is still in the non-exclusive stage, it’s easier to just hide all details of their private life and just feign ignorance.
But sometimes, you’d just want to know the truth, right?
[Read: How to date casually without getting hurt – The 15 casual, hurt-free rules to follow]
The possible signs you’re not the only one she’s sleeping with
Most guys think that you’re the one with a handful of women that you switch around, but this is the 21st century, people. Nowadays, it’s normal for people, including women, to have multiple partners when they’re single… and… not single. Sorry to break it to you. But this is the reality.
Of course, casual dating and even sleeping around *safely, of course* is fine when you’re single, but it becomes tricky when you stop casually dating and go into something more serious. Why? Because then it’s cheating. No one likes to be with a cheater. [Read: The 14 signs you’re dating a serial cheater]
Maybe you’re the notch on her bedpost. What a plot twist. Here are the signs she sleeps around *maybe!*.
1. She’s physically changed
Normally, she’s wearing sweatpants and hanging out with you at home. But now, she’s been doing her makeup, fixing her hair, and maybe even changing her outfits.
If she gets a new shirt, that doesn’t mean anything until you base this on the norm. What is she usually looking like? Has it drastically changed from that norm? [Read: The sneaky signs to watch for if you suspect your girl is cheating on you]
2. She keeps her phone hidden
Guys, this isn’t because she wants alone time with you. If her phone is away, fine. If she’s on a date with her phone out and it’s face down, well, then that’s something.
Why is it always face down? This could be nothing, but it could also indicate that she doesn’t want you to see anything… like a message from another guy.
3. She doesn’t commit
Now, if you’re not in a relationship with her but only casually dating, she may be seeing other guys. And this is fine because you didn’t make it exclusive.
However, a solid sign to see if she’s sleeping with other guys is how she feels about being exclusive. If you initiate the relationship talk, and she doesn’t want to be exclusive, she’s almost 100% sleeping with other people. [Read: Are you a couple? How to know for sure if you’re in a relationship with her]
4. You don’t spend time with her friends
Girls’ time is normal. However, she may keep you from her friends for another reason. Now, most girls tell their friends everything.
The close friends all know what she’s doing and she doesn’t want it to slip out. She makes sure you don’t spend too much time around them.
5. She often makes excuses about ‘working late’
We’ve all heard this one. If you’ve arranged to meet up and she calls to say that she can’t make it, because something ‘came up’ or she’s ‘working late’, the chances are that it’s neither of those excuses at all. She’s probably busy with someone else.
Now, remember that people do have to work late occasionally and things do happen out of the blue, but this should never be more than once or twice.
If it is, the chances of her time being taken by something, or someone, else are pretty high. [Read: To cheat or not to cheat? A guide to make up your mind]
6. She doesn’t say your name much
One of the signs you’re not the only one she’s sleeping with is that she doesn’t call you by your actual name. Instead, she’ll use a pet name, usually a generic one, such as ‘babe’, or ‘honey’.
The reason? She doesn’t want to accidentally mix you up with the other guy, or perhaps, guys. You could tell her that it turns you on when she says your name, and then test her a little bit! [Read: What do guys like to hear in bed more than anything else? 15 turn ons all guys love]
7. She’s nagging you
If she’s always nagged, then this isn’t something out of the ordinary. However, if she used to be calm and now she’s changed, then she may be sleeping with someone else.
This is her emotionally detaching and feeling guilty about it. To get through her emotions, she’ll start picking fights with you about everything. And you don’t even want to be around her. [Read: 25 truthful reasons why women cheat so easily]
8. She turns you down sexually
Now, of course, she has sex with you. If she’s doing this consistently for a long period of time, there is a reason to be suspicious. Now, if you’re in a long-term relationship or a semi-exclusive relationship, not having frequent sex isn’t irregular.
But if this is a fresh relationship and she isn’t wanting to be intimate with you, it’s something to keep an eye on. [Read: How to read the signs your girlfriend isn’t attracted to you sexually]
9. She keeps her friends gender-less
Maybe they prefer not to be labeled with a gender – this is the 21st century. But, most likely a majority of her friends have a gender. If she talks about going somewhere with “a friend,” you can be sure that it’s not a girl. If it was, they would just say “she.”
They tend to think they’re doing a good job of hiding the person, but the lack of pronouns just makes it more obvious.
10. One of the signs you’re not the only one she’s sleeping with – She turns into a housewife out of guilt
She’s cooking for you more often, or ironing your shirts, making your favorite dishes, and has your clothes washed and folded before you even blink. Usually, she’s a complete slob.
Now, if she’s usually like this, then there’s nothing to worry about. What’s her norm? Is this your girl trying to make up for what she did to her man? [Read: Is she cheating? 20 sneaky signs your girl is looking out]
11. She takes her time to reply
She may have seen your message a while ago, but she’s not quick to reply to you. This could be for a variety of reasons, including that she’s around someone and can’t reply to you right away.
This isn’t something you should base everything on, but this is a red flag if it’s added on top of some of these other reasons.
12. She doesn’t want you to go down on her
Of course, there are rules to the exception but a majority of women love cunnilingus. Now if she’s preventing you from eating her out, it could be her period, that she’s not feeling clean, or that someone’s already gone down on her today.
Plus, if she starts giving you unexpected blowjobs on top of that, she may be trying to fix her guilty conscience at the same time. [Read: The glaring warning signs of a cheating girlfriend]
13. The surprise shave/wax
It’s normal for her not to be ready when you’re having sex sometimes, especially if it’s spontaneous. Or if she’s usually unshaven and now shaven, it’s an odd act to do unless you want to impress someone.
Is there a special event happening now? If not, maybe there’s someone else.
14. She points the finger at you
When people are unfaithful to their partners, they tend to turn the finger on them. She’s looking at your phone, messaging you about girls who liked your Instagram photos, and accusing you of flirting with every girl you see.
Now, she’s pushing her insecurities onto you because she knows what she’s done. [Read: Beware – Obvious warning signs of a cheating girlfriend]
15. Your gut feeling tells you
Never push aside your intuition. If your gut is telling you that your girlfriend is sleeping with someone else except for you, that feeling is there for a reason.
Yes, paranoia often happens when you feel insecure about a relationship but your gut rarely lies to you.
If you can see several of these signs she’s sleeping around and your gut just tells you that it’s true, don’t ignore it. [Read: How to listen to your gut and give strength to your inner voice]
16. Someone tells you
Most towns and cities are pretty small places when it comes to gossip. If someone has told you that they’ve seen your girlfriend with another guy, the chances are that she’s sleeping with more than just you.
For sure, it could have been her brother, but if that’s the case she wouldn’t be showing the other signs, would she? People don’t meddle in other people’s relationships for no reason normally; if it’s a friend or someone you trust that’s telling you these things, don’t assume they’re trying to cause a problem. The likelihood is that they’re looking out for you and want you to know the truth.
Remember, one sign means nothing
It’s important not to jump to conclusions when reading these signs she sleeps around. Why? Because if you can only nod along to one or two occasionally, it’s likely to be a coincidence.
However, if you can identify with several and they happen more than occasionally, the chances that you’re not the only one are pretty high. [Read: 15 signs she’s leading you on, using you and pretending to love you]
Nobody likes to be accused of things they’re not doing, but remember that nobody likes to be caught out when they’re guilty either.
If you’re going to call her out on her possible sleeping around, you need to be sure and you have to be able to read her body language. The reason is that she is sure to tell you that you’re the only one. Look out for fidgeting, avoiding your eye contact, and stumbling over her words.
What you need to ask yourself is whether you want to be exclusive and then find out where she’s at on the same question. [Read: What does exclusive mean? 20 ways to know if you’re ready]
Having THE conversation after seeing signs you’re not the only one she’s sleeping with
if you’re spotting regular signs you’re not the only one she’s sleeping with, it’s time to ask yourself how you feel about it.
Of course, it probably doesn’t feel good. But, what do you want out of this relationship? Do you want it to become serious? Are you dating anyone else, or just her? Find out what you want and then it’s time to have the ‘what are we’ conversation.
Now, this conversation needs to be timed well.
Don’t just jump into it after a few weeks because that’s likely to make her run for the hills. If you’re seeing signs she’s sleeping around and you’re pretty sure that you’re not imagining it, it’s important to ascertain what this relationship actually is. [Read: Are you exclusively dating or are you a casual fling? 14 signs to know your status]
Many people choose to have open relationships and they work really well for them. Is that something you could try?
If not, you need to talk about whether or not you’re going to be exclusive. It could be that she simply doesn’t realize that you want something serious. She might think that you’re sleeping with other people too.
It’s only when you have the conversation that you can pinpoint what it is and where it’s going. You can’t blame her for not being exclusive if you never talked about wanting to be that.
[Read: How long should you casually date someone before it gets serious?]
You now know the signs you’re not the only one she’s sleeping with. Do they add up to your situation? Are you her one and only or just on the list with the others?
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