15 Signs He’s Talking to Another Girl & Using You Until He Hooks Her

You’re head over heels for him, but you’re noticing he’s not feeling the same way for you. What’s going on? Do you see the signs he’s talking to another girl?

If you’re wondering about the signs he’s talking to another girl, I feel for you. This isn’t a good experience, and this is coming from someone who’s gone through it. You’re thinking things are going well, but in reality, he’s already setting himself up for someone new.

Of course, you have no idea what he’s doing. Why wouldn’t he dump you first and then talk to someone else? That would be too easy, right? Instead, before you break it off, he’s positioning himself for the next girl. 

Remember, not all men are like this. Yes, there are some men who will do this, and you may be dating him. But, not all guys are going to do this to you. It’s an unpleasant experience, yes, but don’t let this prevent you from trusting other men.

[Read: How to learn to trust men again after being betrayed]

15 warning signs he’s talking to another girl behind your back

What’s important is you figure out what’s going on and put an end to his cruel behavior. So, if you want to know the signs he’s talking to another girl, take a look and see what matches up. 

Don’t let him play you. 

#1 You feel something isn’t right. Maybe it’s one of his colleagues from work and whenever he says her name, you just get a bad feeling about her in your stomach. Either way, you’ve felt that something isn’t right. Maybe he’s cheated; maybe not. But one thing for sure is that everything is not what it seems. [Read: Should you trust your gut? The times you need to listen to it]

#2 One specific person is a priority over you. You used to be his number one, but now, you’re not even in his top ten people. But here’s the thing: someone specific has taken over your position.

He’s now putting the needs of one woman/girl above your needs, which is odd because you two are a couple. Why would he put some other woman above you?

#3 He’s always on his phone. He was never a big texter, but he’s suddenly become quite the expert at it. Recently, he’s always on his phone, but you’re just not quite sure who he’s spending all this time talking to. You may catch him smiling or giggling at his screen, and that’s never a good sign. 

Okay, it is possible it was just a meme he was laughing at. But if he hides his phone suspiciously instead of sharing the joke with you, it could be one of the alarming signs he’s talking to another girl and texting her, even if it’s just for kicks right now.

#4 He’s become secretive. You used to talk about everything, but he’s suddenly changed. He no longer shares with you his day and doesn’t tell you what he does when you’re not around. Before, this was never a problem, but now, he’s decided to become secretive. There’s a reason why. [Read: The subtle signs he’s definitely cheating on you] 

#5 He takes longer to respond to you. I understand that not everyone can reply in thirty seconds. So, take this point lightly unless you’re noticing other signs from this list.

If he’s taking hours to reply to you when he used to be much quicker, then something is up. A man in a loving relationship wouldn’t leave his partner on ‘seen’ or wouldn’t ignore their messages for hours on end. 

#6 He’s been emotionally distant. You were his go-to person when it came to talking about his feelings or his day at work. But he’s no longer sharing any of that information with you.

Well, who’s he talking about these things with then? If he was never a big talker, that’s different. But if he went from being talkative to silent, this could be one of those signs he’s talking to another girl or texting her behind your back. [Read: Is you guy emotionally distant? 15 signs he just doesn’t care anymore]

#7 You two don’t argue anymore. Though people don’t like arguing, it is a healthy sign in a relationship *to an extent, of course*. You used to bicker occasionally or argue about important things in your relationship. But now, it’s like he just doesn’t care anymore. He doesn’t want to fight for this relationship. 

#8 You’re no longer on his social media. You would both post cute photos of each other on Instagram or Facebook, but that’s all come to an end, at least for him. He doesn’t post any photos or stories of you two, making it seem like he’s single. Well, maybe that’s what he wants people to see. [Read: Is he losing interest in you and drifting away?]

#9 His phone is on lockdown. He used to be relaxed about his phone. He would leave it face up on the table, and it wouldn’t be a problem if his phone would light up from a text. But now his phone is on lockdown. He has a new password and doesn’t leave his phone out of eyesight. Wherever he goes, his phone goes. 

#10 He is frequently bailing on you. You will make plans, but then at the last minute, he will text you with a lame excuse to cancel. The funny thing is he wants to know what you’re going to do instead. Maybe he doesn’t want to run into you on the street when he’s out with someone else? Who knows, but bailing on you constantly isn’t a promising sign, and could even be a sign he’s talking to another girl or worse, making plans with her. [Read: How to get a guy to stop playing games with your feelings]

#11 You spend less time with him. And it’s not because you want to. If you had it your way, you would spend more time with him. But you feel like he’s been slowly weaning you off. The only thing you don’t know is who he’s spending all his free time with. Well, one thing we know is it’s not you. 

#12 He has become defensive. Maybe you’ve confronted him about his change of behavior. But instead of being honest with you, he becomes defensive and tries to spin your questions against you. If there was nothing going on, then why would he feel the need to defend himself?

#13 You don’t see his friends anymore. You used to spend time with each other’s friends, but there’s been a sudden pull back on his side. His friends seemed to have disappeared, and there’s a reason why. If he’s talking to someone else, his friends probably know he’s talking to another girl and having you hang out with them only means trouble. [Read: The signs you’re wasting your time in a one-sided relationship]

#14 You’re no longer in his plans. You used to talk about the future, even if the future was next week. But any plans you discussed are no longer even appearing in conversation. Or if they are, he’s quick to avoid making any commitment to them. Don’t you think that’s a little odd? If you’re noticing this, it’s probably one of those warning signs he’s talking to another girl. Or he’s just starting to lose interest in the relationship.

#15 He’s tried to dump you, but you reconciled. You don’t know what exactly brought up the conversation of breaking up, but it definitely wasn’t your idea. He tried to dump you out of nowhere and was hesitant and even refused to tell you why he wants to end things with you. But after some tears from your side, you got back together again. 

[Read: 15 signs he wants to break up but is too afraid to just tell you directly]

Sometimes, you just can’t know for sure if a guy is just losing interest or talking to some other girl behind your back. But if you keep an eye on these signs he’s talking to another girl in mind, and pay attention to the girls he seems to be talking about more often, there’s a good chance you’d be able to put two and two together.

[Read: How to deal with jealousy in a relationship and learn to overcome it]

After looking at the signs he’s talking to another girl, it’s time to sit down and talk to him about it. He may deny it in the beginning but stick with your gut instinct.